Help I need to get rid of a corpse...

crizack said:
depends what corpse really, if it's a hamster...just shove it in a shoebox and dig a 1 foot by 1 foot grave for the furry bastard.

a human would be different. you wouldnt drain the blood down your own taps...that'd be stupid. dna will be left over. the average human has 8 pints of blood. so what i would do is cover my kitchen floor in plastic film or lino, put 3 bin bags over the head, hang the body from the worktop head down, make a deep slice into the neck and drain the blood. the bin bags will hold 8 litres without dripping. once the body seems drained, leave it another 10 mins to make sure.

carefully remove the bin bags and lay the body on the floor. pour a 2 litre bottle of bleach into the bin bag. blood is ever so slighty acidic so any strong alkaline (bleach) added will confuse the dna structure.

i'd burn the finger and toe nails to a crisp, yank the teeth out with pliers and would wax ALL the hair of the body (hair will continue to grow for a few weeks after a person dies so you want as little hair as possible for as long as possible)

if the person has tattoos, dismember that part of the body and remove as much identity as possible, same goes for piercings or other modifications. i would roll the body in the plastic you put on the floor first and then...in the dead of night...having previously kitted out my car boot with bin liners, put in the body with the head upwards to avoid any dripping blood. i would tightly and securely fasten the bin bag of blood and bleach and put it on my passenger seat floor (on top of a few cushions)

this is where it gets tricky. you have to make sure you know where you are going is not covered by cctv, so no inner city areas or industrial estates. earlier in the morning i would of hired a hire car but this be used as a decoy, i will be using my own car for the transportation of the corpse. i would drive to the yorkshire moors, find a drain on a country lane, and empty the bin bag of blood in it (you wouldnt dump the whole bag in it, cos it may overflood sometime.

all this time i would be dressed in paint sprayer overalls with non latex gloves, cling film over my socks and legs and then over my shoes once my feet are in them. i would then drive to the most remote part i could possibly think of and dispose of the body in the undergrowth way away from the roads. i would then drive to blackpool, burn the bin bags and may clothes in a field on the way, make a card transaction in blackpool and then return home before dawn. i would completely cover my kitchen in bleach and leave to soak throughout the day and then take my hire car (which i hadn't used) to the hire shop 2 days later (hired it for three days), go drinking and then return home in the early hours the next morning.

if it ever came to me being questioned. i went for a bus ride to blackpool because i could feel the clutch on my own car going and so hired a new one because i wanted to go to blackpool. i then realised i didnt want to drive as i was tired so i got the bus instead. i had the hire car for three days so i wasnt bothered about losing 1 days driving on it. i got home from blackpool the day after and went driving in my hire car.

is this too long an answer to the op?
Click to expand...

You sound almost as if you have done this before lol
 
BermudaBlue said:
crizack said:
depends what corpse really, if it's a hamster...just shove it in a shoebox and dig a 1 foot by 1 foot grave for the furry bastard.

a human would be different. you wouldnt drain the blood down your own taps...that'd be stupid. dna will be left over. the average human has 8 pints of blood. so what i would do is cover my kitchen floor in plastic film or lino, put 3 bin bags over the head, hang the body from the worktop head down, make a deep slice into the neck and drain the blood. the bin bags will hold 8 litres without dripping. once the body seems drained, leave it another 10 mins to make sure.

carefully remove the bin bags and lay the body on the floor. pour a 2 litre bottle of bleach into the bin bag. blood is ever so slighty acidic so any strong alkaline (bleach) added will confuse the dna structure.

i'd burn the finger and toe nails to a crisp, yank the teeth out with pliers and would wax ALL the hair of the body (hair will continue to grow for a few weeks after a person dies so you want as little hair as possible for as long as possible)

if the person has tattoos, dismember that part of the body and remove as much identity as possible, same goes for piercings or other modifications. i would roll the body in the plastic you put on the floor first and then...in the dead of night...having previously kitted out my car boot with bin liners, put in the body with the head upwards to avoid any dripping blood. i would tightly and securely fasten the bin bag of blood and bleach and put it on my passenger seat floor (on top of a few cushions)

this is where it gets tricky. you have to make sure you know where you are going is not covered by cctv, so no inner city areas or industrial estates. earlier in the morning i would of hired a hire car but this be used as a decoy, i will be using my own car for the transportation of the corpse. i would drive to the yorkshire moors, find a drain on a country lane, and empty the bin bag of blood in it (you wouldnt dump the whole bag in it, cos it may overflood sometime.

all this time i would be dressed in paint sprayer overalls with non latex gloves, cling film over my socks and legs and then over my shoes once my feet are in them. i would then drive to the most remote part i could possibly think of and dispose of the body in the undergrowth way away from the roads. i would then drive to blackpool, burn the bin bags and may clothes in a field on the way, make a card transaction in blackpool and then return home before dawn. i would completely cover my kitchen in bleach and leave to soak throughout the day and then take my hire car (which i hadn't used) to the hire shop 2 days later (hired it for three days), go drinking and then return home in the early hours the next morning.

if it ever came to me being questioned. i went for a bus ride to blackpool because i could feel the clutch on my own car going and so hired a new one because i wanted to go to blackpool. i then realised i didnt want to drive as i was tired so i got the bus instead. i had the hire car for three days so i wasnt bothered about losing 1 days driving on it. i got home from blackpool the day after and went driving in my hire car.

is this too long an answer to the op?
Click to expand...

You sound almost as if you have done this before lol
Click to expand...
You could do all that or just get a job at the local crematoriam
 
I would suggest, you go to a cemetery in the very early hours where you know that a funeral will taking place later that day.
A hole will already have been dug for the funeral.
So take your own spade and dig another 2 ft down in the hole, place your corpse in the grave and then cover with the soil you dug.
Later, obviously a coffin will be placed over your corpse and the grave officially filled in.

Don't forget, you made need to take some stepladders to get out of the hole :-)
 
put it in waddling distance of eamonn holmes

i'll give it 15 minutes till he's dabbing up the remnants with some crusty bread.
 
Harvey-Keitel-Photograph-C1179.jpg


ring the wolf
 
crizack said:
depends what corpse really, if it's a hamster...just shove it in a shoebox and dig a 1 foot by 1 foot grave for the furry bastard.

a human would be different. you wouldnt drain the blood down your own taps...that'd be stupid. dna will be left over. the average human has 8 pints of blood. so what i would do is cover my kitchen floor in plastic film or lino, put 3 bin bags over the head, hang the body from the worktop head down, make a deep slice into the neck and drain the blood. the bin bags will hold 8 litres without dripping. once the body seems drained, leave it another 10 mins to make sure.

carefully remove the bin bags and lay the body on the floor. pour a 2 litre bottle of bleach into the bin bag. blood is ever so slighty acidic so any strong alkaline (bleach) added will confuse the dna structure.

i'd burn the finger and toe nails to a crisp, yank the teeth out with pliers and would wax ALL the hair of the body (hair will continue to grow for a few weeks after a person dies so you want as little hair as possible for as long as possible)

if the person has tattoos, dismember that part of the body and remove as much identity as possible, same goes for piercings or other modifications. i would roll the body in the plastic you put on the floor first and then...in the dead of night...having previously kitted out my car boot with bin liners, put in the body with the head upwards to avoid any dripping blood. i would tightly and securely fasten the bin bag of blood and bleach and put it on my passenger seat floor (on top of a few cushions)

this is where it gets tricky. you have to make sure you know where you are going is not covered by cctv, so no inner city areas or industrial estates. earlier in the morning i would of hired a hire car but this be used as a decoy, i will be using my own car for the transportation of the corpse. i would drive to the yorkshire moors, find a drain on a country lane, and empty the bin bag of blood in it (you wouldnt dump the whole bag in it, cos it may overflood sometime.

all this time i would be dressed in paint sprayer overalls with non latex gloves, cling film over my socks and legs and then over my shoes once my feet are in them. i would then drive to the most remote part i could possibly think of and dispose of the body in the undergrowth way away from the roads. i would then drive to blackpool, burn the bin bags and may clothes in a field on the way, make a card transaction in blackpool and then return home before dawn. i would completely cover my kitchen in bleach and leave to soak throughout the day and then take my hire car (which i hadn't used) to the hire shop 2 days later (hired it for three days), go drinking and then return home in the early hours the next morning.

if it ever came to me being questioned. i went for a bus ride to blackpool because i could feel the clutch on my own car going and so hired a new one because i wanted to go to blackpool. i then realised i didnt want to drive as i was tired so i got the bus instead. i had the hire car for three days so i wasnt bothered about losing 1 days driving on it. i got home from blackpool the day after and went driving in my hire car.

is this too long an answer to the op?
Click to expand...


There is a massive flaw in that plan.
All bus stations have CCTV so that's the first thing the Police would check and where did you stay in Blackpool?
 
i didnt stay over in blackpool.i got the bus there and the bus back. but the cctv is disconcerting. lets hope they dont bother looking for cctv after my story of the hire car and the blackpool transaction. it would seem to them impossible that at i could of dumped the body in yorkshire yet made a transaction in blackpool. even if they say ''we cant see you on the cctv'', they wont see me getting rid of the corpse on the moors so it's alright.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.