It's valentine's day...

[mat]

That’s more Naren Irelind. Ffs get your Tangs right Mat! Have a word with yourself. It was getting a sad arse tanking.

You're right mate. Sounds better in a Derry dialect.

 

[Ballet On Ice]

Gondola down the Irwell

Lovely position.

As the best romantic verses go
If you want the love and passion
Give it to her doggy fashion

 

[snorky]

You can tell its the day of luuurv....... BMR has washed his wanksock

 

[Mozzer]

I've a table for the wife tonight at 8-30.

I hope she likes snooker.

 

[Bluemoon dan]

A few years ago when it fell on a Saturday me and the missus made the mistake of going out for a meal on the night. Never again. The restaurant had tried to cram in 3 sittings but hadn't left enough time between each one. We got there at 6 and were met by an already stressed waiter, he took our names, basically threw 2 menus at us and walked us to the table. As he was walking he was asking to take our drinks orders which were then shouted across the room at the bar staff. We sat down and he stood there hovering waiting for us to give our food orders too. We asked for a minute and were given about 30 seconds before he was back.
The meal itself was crap and we spent it constantly being monitored by the staff waiting for us to finish. I put my fork down for a second to take a drink and the waiter was in trying to take my plate. I swear that as my finished starter was being taken back to the kitchen it was passed by my main meal coming out.

So no, not doing anything tonight!

 

[BlueMoonRisin’]

You can tell its the day of luuurv....... BMR has washed his wanksock

I would have, if I had some of them washing machine soap ball thingies that ya lob in the washing machine mate.

 

[BlueMoonRisin’]

Asda was full of blokes scouring the flowers section last night, all the prices had gone up from normal. I said 'RIGHT, WHERE'S THE CHEAPEST ONES', and grabbed a small bouquet of roses that didn't look dead. All this fannying round, get them the cheapest ones, fill their ears with sweet nothings and get your shags in lads.

If i may offer a bit of advice mate with you being a tight ****. Save your money whilst fannying around Asda, don't even offer sweet nothings in her ear. Save the romantic stuff, it's not worth it.

Just pull your throbbing heart shaped bell end out and spaff your manfat, uttering those three words "In yer face"; )

 

[denislawsbackheel]

Not bought a Valentine card in 44 years of marriage.

Mind you we are off to Venice on Sunday for a few days.

 

[feelymcfeel]

I've been put under strict orders to do nothing for St. Valentine's Day because it's "a fucking hallmark bunch of bollocks."

Couldn't agree with her more.

 

[york away to this!]

As noted in the other thread of crumbling self-pity, we started the day with a lovely romantic fall-out at the therapists. Now working, though I may treat myself to a long, leisurely wank later... which will be nice.