Joke thread

[Lavinda Past]

I had a talking dog once. I bought him from a ventriloquist.

After I paid for him, the dog looked up at the ventriloquist and said, “So, you sold me. Well just for that I'll never say another word.”

And he hasn't.

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

A young high school girl went to the catholic church one day for confession. The priest was already in the confessional and the high school girl entered. “Bless me Father for I have sinned. My last confession was 3 months ago.”

The priest asked what her confession was. She admitted she was pregnant. The priest asked, but you are so young! How did this happen?

She replied that it was the Second Coming. The priest didn't understand.

“What do you mean the Second Coming?” he asked.

The girl replied “Well, I swallowed the first one!”

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[kippaxneil]

View attachment 128236

Orgies are alright, I suppose...but you never know who to thank on the way out.

 

[kippaxneil]

I bet John Lennon would have loved online transactions.
'Imagine all the PayPal'....