meltonblue
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- Joined
- 14 May 2013
- Messages
- 7,020
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
The plane obviously turned round and landed after the pilot took over from the girlfriend on the joystick
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
The missus was admiring her new earrings I had made for her and said " Wow, these are the dogs bollocks!"
I said "Yes...maybe that'll make the bugger think twice about barking all night."
I said "Yes...maybe that'll make the bugger think twice about barking all night."
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I asked a woman for a date once, but she refused, saying that I had a face like the back of a boat.
I didn't reply, I just gave her a stern look.
I didn't reply, I just gave her a stern look.
talkativesprout
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- 30 Mar 2009
- Messages
- 10,294
After reading your jokes are you sure it was yer Kidneys and not yer funny-bone?
Keep going man, I'm a 50+ yr old Dad of 3 and your stuff is better than waterboarding when we go out on a long drive ;)
BimboBob
Well-Known Member
You want proper waterboarding son? Do you? DO YOU? I'll bring the pain.
Sorry, I meant watersports.
talkativesprout
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 30 Mar 2009
- Messages
- 10,294
lol....I have done a lot of drugs
I have also played
Watersports
Like a finger up the anus...Its a sensation that has multiple excitement profiles
A guy came home from the pub pissed up with cowshit all over his head !
His wife said what have you been doing? He said I took a short cut over the farmers field on my way home, my cap blew off and I had to try twenty others on before I found it !
His wife said what have you been doing? He said I took a short cut over the farmers field on my way home, my cap blew off and I had to try twenty others on before I found it !
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
A grocer in a small corner shop was making out with his younger female assistant behind the counter when the shop bell rang as a customer entered the store.
The assistant had her back to the door and quickly moved sideways and into the back room to adjust her clothing.
The grocer moved forward and covered his state of undress below the waist by stepping behind the cash register.
The customer, a lady, walks up to the counter: “You look very flush Mr Brown!” She said to the grocer.
“Well, Mrs. Smith" he says quietly.... "between the two of us, I’ve just come into some money”
The assistant had her back to the door and quickly moved sideways and into the back room to adjust her clothing.
The grocer moved forward and covered his state of undress below the waist by stepping behind the cash register.
The customer, a lady, walks up to the counter: “You look very flush Mr Brown!” She said to the grocer.
“Well, Mrs. Smith" he says quietly.... "between the two of us, I’ve just come into some money”
