Joke thread

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[Fiftyyearsandcounting]

An avid train spotter died while travelling on a local steam train. Sad, but he was chuffed to death.

 

[sir baconface]

 

[Grumpyman]

 

[mancity2012_eamo]

Right. Who laughed?
Who laughed?

You shower of racist bar stewards.

 

[JRockBlues]

The only thing he's blocked all season. (Not me, I just nicked it off twitter)

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

 

[goalmole]

View attachment 30644

Busted!!!

 

[LWashington]

That would have worked for @Magicpole or Sean Connery, but took me a while to get it

Try this one.

Experts are predicting that this fight will be fought at close range, 18 inches to be precise.

 

[blue44]

 

[JRockBlues]

Last night I watched a fascinating documentary on cocaine. In future I think I'll watch all documentaries that way.

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

You da man, a Dyson vacuum for Christmas, brilliant the closest I can come to that was before we were married we went to the pub, I asked the soon to be very lucky one what she wanted to drink. She said surprise me,
I got her a glass of water.

When it's your round, you always buy water.

 

[Blue Mist]

When it's your round, you always buy water.

Buy ? Tap water is free and it is better for you than the shite you drink.

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

Buy ? Tap water is free and it is better for you than the shite you drink.

It's free ?, you are more of a tight arse than I first thought

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[LWashington]

Last night I watched a fascinating documentary on cocaine. In future I think I'll watch all documentaries that way.

Reminded me of this one.

Policeman, " I'm arresting you under the Misuse of Drugs Act."
Suspect "Nonsense, I'm using them perfectly, that why I'm stoned as fuck."