joke thread....

lefty goldblatt

Well-Known Member
Joined
1 Jul 2012
Messages
3,827
The Council Job Interview

Ex-Squaddie goes to the local council to apply for a job in the office
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine."

"Have you ever worked for the public service before?"

"Yes, I was in the army." he says, "I was in Iraq for two tours."

The interviewer says, "That will give
you 5 extra points towards employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in
any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A mine exploded
near me when I was there and I lost
both of my testicles".

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to take you on right away. Our normal
hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm....... but you can start tomorrow at 10.00am and carry on starting at 10.00am every day."

The bloke is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm, why don't you want me here until 10.00am?
I'm not looking for any special treatment y'know"

"What you have to understand is that this is a council job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand
around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks.

There's no point in you coming in for that."The Council Job Interview

Ex-Squaddie goes to the local council to apply for a job in the office
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine."

"Have you ever worked for the public service before?"

"Yes, I was in the army." he says, "I was in Iraq for two tours."

The interviewer says, "That will give
you 5 extra points towards employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in
any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A mine exploded
near me when I was there and I lost
both of my testicles".

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to take you on right away. Our normal
hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm....... but you can start tomorrow at 10.00am and carry on starting at 10.00am every day."

The bloke is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm, why don't you want me here until 10.00am?
I'm not looking for any special treatment y'know"

"What you have to understand is that this is a council job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand
around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks.

There's no point in you coming in for that."
 

blue b4 the moon

Well-Known Member
Joined
25 Feb 2005
Messages
31,992
Location
315
The Council Job Interview

Ex-Squaddie goes to the local council to apply for a job in the office
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine."

"Have you ever worked for the public service before?"

"Yes, I was in the army." he says, "I was in Iraq for two tours."

The interviewer says, "That will give
you 5 extra points towards employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in
any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A mine exploded
near me when I was there and I lost
both of my testicles".

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to take you on right away. Our normal
hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm....... but you can start tomorrow at 10.00am and carry on starting at 10.00am every day."

The bloke is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm, why don't you want me here until 10.00am?
I'm not looking for any special treatment y'know"

"What you have to understand is that this is a council job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand
around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks.

There's no point in you coming in for that."The Council Job Interview

Ex-Squaddie goes to the local council to apply for a job in the office
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine."

"Have you ever worked for the public service before?"

"Yes, I was in the army." he says, "I was in Iraq for two tours."

The interviewer says, "That will give
you 5 extra points towards employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in
any way?" The guy says, "Yes. A mine exploded
near me when I was there and I lost
both of my testicles".

The interviewer grimaces and then says, "O.K. You've got enough points for me to take you on right away. Our normal
hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm....... but you can start tomorrow at 10.00am and carry on starting at 10.00am every day."

The bloke is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 8.00am to 4.00pm, why don't you want me here until 10.00am?
I'm not looking for any special treatment y'know"

"What you have to understand is that this is a council job," the interviewer says, "For the first two hours, we just stand
around drinking coffee and scratching our bollocks.

There's no point in you coming in for that."
Nope can't find a punchline in that for copy & pasting it twice.
 

bluethrunthru

Well-Known Member
Joined
19 May 2012
Messages
36,653
Location
Stockpiling
Shouldn't this be in the Jadon Sancho thread?

I am really worried - the January window is fast approaching and we have yet to identify - big up and say we are going to pay big money for a player who is bang average so the rags can push in, buy him and claim a "win". We are really losing our touch at running up no-hopers for them to buy.
 

bluethrunthru

Well-Known Member
Joined
19 May 2012
Messages
36,653
Location
Stockpiling
or to put it another way...

OGS walks into a bar................. well given the way its going for him who wouldn't turn to drink...........
 

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