Indaparkside
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 28 Dec 2015
- Messages
- 14,961
Roy Keane more like
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Bill Walker
Well-Known Member
blue b4 the moon
Well-Known Member
And that Mclair too.
balotellishaircut
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Mar 2014
- Messages
- 6,533
- Team supported
- City
I’m having regular sex with a blind woman. The sex is great but it isn’t easy getting her husband’s voice right.
balotellishaircut
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Mar 2014
- Messages
- 6,533
- Team supported
- City
Just been getting the decorations out of the loft and I found the 1977 Xmas edition of the radio times.
Or as it’s called today, the sex offenders register.
Or as it’s called today, the sex offenders register.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
A guy walks into the bank, pulls out a gun, points it at the teller and screams, “Give me all your money or you’re geography!”
The teller replies, “Don’t you mean history?”
The robber says, “Don’t change the subject!"
The teller replies, “Don’t you mean history?”
The robber says, “Don’t change the subject!"
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
A man moves to Montana. His closest neighbour is 10 miles down the road.
After several months of no other human interactions he's checking the mailbox when a truck approaches and stops. The driver introduces himself as his neighbour. After some chit chat the man says, "How do you get by with no women around?"
His neighbour points to a hill off in the distance and says "see those sheep way out there on that hill..."
Before he can say another word, the man says "That's disgusting! I'd never do that!"
The neighbor just smiles and says "we'll see" and drives off.
A month later the man is getting the mail when he can't contain any longer. He hikes until he reaches the flock. He looks around and finds the prettiest sheep and takes her home but he can't do the deed.
He figures a date may help. He gives the sheep a bath, puts a bow in its hair, puts it in the truck and drives 40 miles to the nearest town.
They pull up at the bar and he grabs the sheep and walks in. Immediately the place goes silent.
The man sees every guy inside looking at him. "How dare you judge me!" he says. "There's not one of you who hasn't or wouldn't do the same as me!"
Suddenly a voice responds,"Sir, you are correct, but that's the sheriff's girl you're with!"
After several months of no other human interactions he's checking the mailbox when a truck approaches and stops. The driver introduces himself as his neighbour. After some chit chat the man says, "How do you get by with no women around?"
His neighbour points to a hill off in the distance and says "see those sheep way out there on that hill..."
Before he can say another word, the man says "That's disgusting! I'd never do that!"
The neighbor just smiles and says "we'll see" and drives off.
A month later the man is getting the mail when he can't contain any longer. He hikes until he reaches the flock. He looks around and finds the prettiest sheep and takes her home but he can't do the deed.
He figures a date may help. He gives the sheep a bath, puts a bow in its hair, puts it in the truck and drives 40 miles to the nearest town.
They pull up at the bar and he grabs the sheep and walks in. Immediately the place goes silent.
The man sees every guy inside looking at him. "How dare you judge me!" he says. "There's not one of you who hasn't or wouldn't do the same as me!"
Suddenly a voice responds,"Sir, you are correct, but that's the sheriff's girl you're with!"
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
My local DIY shop had a sign in the window.
Ladders for hire.
I thought, why else would you want them?
Ladders for hire.
I thought, why else would you want them?
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I used to work as a product tester at Clark's shoes
It was sole destroying.
It was sole destroying.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I've invented noise cancelling earphones designed to block out irritating Christmas music playing in shops and supermarkets
I call them Bahumbuds
I call them Bahumbuds