Joke thread

The world's leading expert on European wasps was taking a stroll down his local high street one afternoon. As he passed the record shop, a sign in the window caught his eye: "Just Released – Wasps of Europe & The Sounds They Make – Available Now!".
Unable to resist, the expert hurried inside. "Excuse me," he said to the shop assistant, "do you have European Vespidae Acoustics Volume 2? I believe it came out this week.".
The assistant checked the computer. "Certainly, sir! Would you like to listen before you buy?".
"Absolutely!" the expert replied. He put on the heavy studio headphones, and the assistant started the turntable. The expert listened intently for a few moments, then frowned and took the headphones off. "I'm terribly sorry," he said, "but I've been studying European wasps for 43 years, and this is simply incorrect. I don't recognise any of these sounds.".
The assistant apologised and checked the record. "Ah, my mistake, sir. That was just the intro. Let me skip ahead to the second track.".
The expert put the headphones back on, but within seconds, he was fuming. He threw them onto the counter. "This is outrageous false advertising! I am the world's foremost authority in this field, and no European wasp has ever made a sound like that!".
The manager of the shop, hearing the commotion, rushed over to see what was wrong. The expert turned to him, red-faced. "This record is a sham! I know every buzz, click, and hum a European wasp can produce, and these recordings are a complete fabrication!".
The manager glanced down at the turntable, noticed the problem immediately, and sighed. "I am so sorry, sir," the manager said. "It appears we've been playing you the ...








Bee side.
 
Bill Walker said:
The world's leading expert on European wasps was taking a stroll down his local high street one afternoon. As he passed the record shop, a sign in the window caught his eye: "Just Released – Wasps of Europe & The Sounds They Make – Available Now!".
Unable to resist, the expert hurried inside. "Excuse me," he said to the shop assistant, "do you have European Vespidae Acoustics Volume 2? I believe it came out this week.".
The assistant checked the computer. "Certainly, sir! Would you like to listen before you buy?".
"Absolutely!" the expert replied. He put on the heavy studio headphones, and the assistant started the turntable. The expert listened intently for a few moments, then frowned and took the headphones off. "I'm terribly sorry," he said, "but I've been studying European wasps for 43 years, and this is simply incorrect. I don't recognise any of these sounds.".
The assistant apologised and checked the record. "Ah, my mistake, sir. That was just the intro. Let me skip ahead to the second track.".
The expert put the headphones back on, but within seconds, he was fuming. He threw them onto the counter. "This is outrageous false advertising! I am the world's foremost authority in this field, and no European wasp has ever made a sound like that!".
The manager of the shop, hearing the commotion, rushed over to see what was wrong. The expert turned to him, red-faced. "This record is a sham! I know every buzz, click, and hum a European wasp can produce, and these recordings are a complete fabrication!".
The manager glanced down at the turntable, noticed the problem immediately, and sighed. "I am so sorry, sir," the manager said. "It appears we've been playing you the ...








Bee side.
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