BamberBridgeBlue
Well-Known Member
Just watching SSN. On the intro they’re still showing Rooney’s shinner overhead kick vs us. How many years ago? That’s how far back they have to go lol.
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Media discussion - 2024/25
- Thread starter Ric
- Start date
Scene:
Prematch news conference sometime in mid october.
PR and media person: ‘good morning assembled members of the press, today, following the collapse and complete exhonaration of the allegations against Manchester City by the PL, we will be doing this news conference in reverse. Our esteemed manager Pep guardiola will be asking the questions and you will answer them,’
<general murmers of discontent and feet shuffling. A Mr Roan looks like he is suddenly taking an important call and makes hand waving gestures to that effect, as heescapes lurches from the room>
Pep: ‘good morning everyone, fantastic morning, I am so, so pleased to be sitting here and asking the questions… it has been a long long time, heh!’
<cheeky wink from Pep>
Pep: ‘so, number one question, mr Slimey Stone, BBC…’
SS: ‘errr that’s Simon?’
<pep pauses, gives a little shake of head>
Pep: ‘…as we all say, Mr Slimey, BBC, do you not feel that most people would interpret the gift of a very very expensive watch to a man with a large potential press influence by one football club, would undermine the integrity of reporting about that club and perhaps show them in an unreasonable good light, whilst denigrating their noisy neighbours in the adjoining City of Manchester?’
SS: ‘err… I… that is…’
Pep: ‘excellent, so, so good answer, as it’s impossible to uphold that position given the factual evidence… I wish you much luck in your next job’
Pep: ‘mr Jamie Paradise, purveyor of bad, bad, log rolling autobiographies, I have one question, one question only… why?’
JP: ‘ole! Ole! OLE!’
Pep: ‘so, so expected mr paradise, I wish you well in your padded cell and crayons’
Pep: ‘mr Nick harris, so so good to see you , I have a present for you..’
NH: ‘get to..’
Pep: ‘no, it is perfect, totally perfect… it is nose hair trimmers… I get so, so distracted by them waving when you say question to me, I think they are perfect’
Pep: ‘mr Miguel Delaney, I can barely see you, are you sitting on the floor? No, never mind, it’s not important. Some people would accuse you of rank hypocrisy condemning business owners for being a front for, heh, so called sportswashing, whilst working for business with ties to an autocratic regime yourself, but no, no me, I just think you are a paid shill’
MD: ‘!’
PR: ‘If I may bring in the PFA Player of the year, Phil Foden, to ask a question…’
<neil custis moves like it’s last orders at the kebab shop and sprints from the room to put Usain Bolt to shame>
PR: ‘oh, well that’s just rude, I’m sorry Phil, can you just sit backdown on the bench and polish those 17 trophies you’ve won in the recent past… 6 years I think?’
PR: ‘so pep would you please continue’
<pep reaches down, gets out the biggest cigar this side of a comedy sketch, nonchalanty digs out a match, ignites it off the sole of an immaculate shoe, lights the cigar, draws, and blows out the biggest ring this side of a Xxx porn show, sticks his feet on the desk, and with a twinkle in his eye…>
Pep: ‘of course, txiki come here with the paperwork, it does say another 5 years didn’t it? And you, you lot, you can be my so, so important witnesses to this contract extension…’
<press conference comes to an abrupt end, as pep is engulfed in a tsunami of spittle and tears from the assorted ranks>
Prematch news conference sometime in mid october.
PR and media person: ‘good morning assembled members of the press, today, following the collapse and complete exhonaration of the allegations against Manchester City by the PL, we will be doing this news conference in reverse. Our esteemed manager Pep guardiola will be asking the questions and you will answer them,’
<general murmers of discontent and feet shuffling. A Mr Roan looks like he is suddenly taking an important call and makes hand waving gestures to that effect, as he
Pep: ‘good morning everyone, fantastic morning, I am so, so pleased to be sitting here and asking the questions… it has been a long long time, heh!’
<cheeky wink from Pep>
Pep: ‘so, number one question, mr Slimey Stone, BBC…’
SS: ‘errr that’s Simon?’
<pep pauses, gives a little shake of head>
Pep: ‘…as we all say, Mr Slimey, BBC, do you not feel that most people would interpret the gift of a very very expensive watch to a man with a large potential press influence by one football club, would undermine the integrity of reporting about that club and perhaps show them in an unreasonable good light, whilst denigrating their noisy neighbours in the adjoining City of Manchester?’
SS: ‘err… I… that is…’
Pep: ‘excellent, so, so good answer, as it’s impossible to uphold that position given the factual evidence… I wish you much luck in your next job’
Pep: ‘mr Jamie Paradise, purveyor of bad, bad, log rolling autobiographies, I have one question, one question only… why?’
JP: ‘ole! Ole! OLE!’
Pep: ‘so, so expected mr paradise, I wish you well in your padded cell and crayons’
Pep: ‘mr Nick harris, so so good to see you , I have a present for you..’
NH: ‘get to..’
Pep: ‘no, it is perfect, totally perfect… it is nose hair trimmers… I get so, so distracted by them waving when you say question to me, I think they are perfect’
Pep: ‘mr Miguel Delaney, I can barely see you, are you sitting on the floor? No, never mind, it’s not important. Some people would accuse you of rank hypocrisy condemning business owners for being a front for, heh, so called sportswashing, whilst working for business with ties to an autocratic regime yourself, but no, no me, I just think you are a paid shill’
MD: ‘!’
PR: ‘If I may bring in the PFA Player of the year, Phil Foden, to ask a question…’
<neil custis moves like it’s last orders at the kebab shop and sprints from the room to put Usain Bolt to shame>
PR: ‘oh, well that’s just rude, I’m sorry Phil, can you just sit backdown on the bench and polish those 17 trophies you’ve won in the recent past… 6 years I think?’
PR: ‘so pep would you please continue’
<pep reaches down, gets out the biggest cigar this side of a comedy sketch, nonchalanty digs out a match, ignites it off the sole of an immaculate shoe, lights the cigar, draws, and blows out the biggest ring this side of a Xxx porn show, sticks his feet on the desk, and with a twinkle in his eye…>
Pep: ‘of course, txiki come here with the paperwork, it does say another 5 years didn’t it? And you, you lot, you can be my so, so important witnesses to this contract extension…’
<press conference comes to an abrupt end, as pep is engulfed in a tsunami of spittle and tears from the assorted ranks>
Just got called a "dick head" by a pissed up cockney for the crime of wearing a city shirt (in Thailand) . This is the media's fault for creating this agenda against city and it's fans.
Might not have been about the shirt... ;)
mexico1970
Well-Known Member
The cockney was kindly pointing out that his fly was undone.Might not have been about the shirt... ;)
You certainly cain.Can I copyright ‘maight’
:-D
Gone for a Burton
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 9 Nov 2022
- Messages
- 4,511
- Team supported
- City
Trip forward a stick two fingers in his eyes....there's no crime in tripping !!Correct but don’t let it stop you from telling the Cnut to do one
spacecadet
Well-Known Member
Just read The Guardian is about to report another massive loss. There will be big job cuts to follow. Ronay and Liew will be touching cloth for sure.
manimanc
Well-Known Member
Oh how my heart bleeds, Liew deserves everything he gets the mug.Just read The Guardian is about to report another massive loss. There will be big job cuts to follow. Ronay and Liew will be touching cloth for sure.
cheekybids
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 18 Sep 2009
- Messages
- 10,563
Just read The Guardian is about to report another massive loss. There will be big job cuts to follow. Ronay and Liew will be touching cloth for sure.
Does Fleet Street have PSR also.