Mods in Limericks

[gaudinho's stolen car]

Gaudinho's Stolen Car
gazed upon beauty from afar.
He asked out a beautiful girl
and took her for a whirl
but she said the sex was distinctly below par.

Have you been reading my diary?

 

[lloydie]

When De Nero was stopped by a copper
the copper said "what a proper whopper,
I'd more likely believe
it's a rug not a weave
you should dump it in that garden hopper"

 

[Anonymous]

there is a sage in our mist
hes a wizard that you cannot dismiss
knowledge on every subject
his retorts are simply perfect
i wonder at his mind ,
excited at the next fact he may find
Damocles you really do bamboozle
until i learnt you fucking use google

Google 'limerick' and see what comes up . . . before you get it so embarrassingly wrong again.

i just googled " arsehole with no life " and it came up with your user name

Go figure ??

Corky he struggled with words
His head being chock full of turds
He acted real tough
but was made of shit stuff
and was routinely slapped silly by birds

Now that's a limerick corky - not a particularly good one but it serves as a rough example of the form of rhyme. It's also uncomfortably accurate but that's because I know you . . so lighten up, try actually googling limerick (I'll tell you how to 'google' if you like), get a bit of basic education and stop acting like like the hard case that you're not.

 

[Bill]

On Sunday when trying to defend
Our captain was deemed to offend
The ban was appealed
The panel revealed
To be Webb, Wayne Rooney and Friend

They met at the home of the FA
Attempting to contrive a way
To uphold the decision
Despite the derision
That greeted it back on Sunday

They looked at the player's behaviour
It looked like a tackle to savour
But it came to the votes
And a bag of used notes
Swung it back into Ferguson's favour

To show the FA is farsighted
All future appeals will be sited
At United's HQ
And every review
Will be sponsored by Manchester United

In deciding where to spend fees
A different policy sees
Mancini invest
In only the best
Whilst others just buy referees

truly outstanding.

 

[Rascal]

On Sunday when trying to defend
Our captain was deemed to offend
The ban was appealed
The panel revealed
To be Webb, Wayne Rooney and Friend

They met at the home of the FA
Attempting to contrive a way
To uphold the decision
Despite the derision
That greeted it back on Sunday

They looked at the player's behaviour
It looked like a tackle to savour
But it came to the votes
And a bag of used notes
Swung it back into Ferguson's favour

To show the FA is farsighted
All future appeals will be sited
At United's HQ
And every review
Will be sponsored by Manchester United

In deciding where to spend fees
A different policy sees
Mancini invest
In only the best
Whilst others just buy referees

Take a bow, thats superb mate

 

[gaudinho's stolen car]

On Sunday when trying to defend
Our captain was deemed to offend
The ban was appealed
The panel revealed
To be Webb, Wayne Rooney and Friend

They met at the home of the FA
Attempting to contrive a way
To uphold the decision
Despite the derision
That greeted it back on Sunday

They looked at the player's behaviour
It looked like a tackle to savour
But it came to the votes
And a bag of used notes
Swung it back into Ferguson's favour

To show the FA is farsighted
All future appeals will be sited
At United's HQ
And every review
Will be sponsored by Manchester United

In deciding where to spend fees
A different policy sees
Mancini invest
In only the best
Whilst others just buy referees

truly outstanding.

UU should do a weekly rhyme on that weeks events and put it on the blog.

 

[Ducado]

I like the idea of having our own poet in residence!

The Bard of Bluemoon!

 

[Cellarite]

On Sunday when trying to defend
Our captain was deemed to offend
The ban was appealed
The panel revealed
To be Webb, Wayne Rooney and Friend

They met at the home of the FA
Attempting to contrive a way
To uphold the decision
Despite the derision
That greeted it back on Sunday

They looked at the player's behaviour
It looked like a tackle to savour
But it came to the votes
And a bag of used notes
Swung it back into Ferguson's favour

To show the FA is farsighted
All future appeals will be sited
At United's HQ
And every review
Will be sponsored by Manchester United

In deciding where to spend fees
A different policy sees
Mancini invest
In only the best
Whilst others just buy referees

utter genius. your previous ones were good but this is fucking ace.

 

[another generation]

On the board of Bluemoon is a poet
And many are starting to know it
He gives us a laugh
Not a word said is naff
To UU the Blue, we owe it

 

[stony]

I like the idea of having our own poet in residence!

The Bard of Bluemoon!

Has Anton seen this thread yet ?