just so you don't tar us all with the same brush,
What are your expectations for the rest of this season?
We've signed a kid from France (no surprise there) and loaned Remy from QPR who may very well be heading straight to jail. What are my expectations? Survival, but not by much. 1st team is strong, the minute we lose anyone from the starting 11 we're in trouble. We've no sub right back, no striker (Shola doesn't count as a footballer unless we play the mackems), no real deputy for Krul and if Ben Arfa gets crocked we've no real invention in midfield.
Are you happy with the manager?
"We are, although a number of Newcastle fans would like Alan Pardew replaced - but we don't think the manager was given a big enough squad to play those 14 games in Europe last season, when we reached the last eight of the Europa League."
We're not like, he's a mouth piece for Ashley and if he had a bit more backbone he'd have already walked. He's tactically limited and needs another coach or two to help him on that side of things. However, with this owner, he won't get the financial backing in the window, and it'll be increasingly hard to convince players to join a club who's owner's ambition is to finish 17th or above. However, he's probably the level of manager we can expect.
"We should do a lot better in the coming season, with a bigger squad and a lot less games."
This nonsense can fuck right off, yes we played in Europe, but we also dropped out of the cups fairly sharpish. Also we definitely do not have a bigger squad, we've let Simpson and Perch go for naff all, despite both being adequate subs. Perch (for all his faults and he has many) is a cheap utility player who can plug any of 5 gaps in case of injury. Simpson is an average Premier League right back.
Who are your key players?
A fit Ben Arfa will terrify any defender, if we can keep him on the pitch and release the ball to him quicker (I don't want to see him having to drop deep to collect the ball from Colo) we'll be a much better team. Cabaye is important, but if we stop 4-4-2 and go to a 4-5-1/4-3-3 style Sissoko could become vital. He's a Yaya Toure type of player and yet Pardew tries to start him as a striker or even worse, out wide . Colocinni is massive for us, he improves each defender by a noticeable measure. If he's crocked or he is involved in another illegitimate kid scandal, and we have to start Taylor and Mbiwa... well we're fucked.
Were you happy with the business conducted during the January transfer window?
Well, if it were in addition to any kind of business in the previous summer and followed up by any kind of business in this window. Sissoko can be quality, Gouffran is a decent enough player, Haidara looks a prospect at left back... but all of these players could (and should) have been signed in the preceding summer in preparation for the European campaign. The Europa League was a genuine chance of winning silverware for the 1st time in half a fucking century and Mike Ashley didn't invest because he wanted to save a few million. (Just like he would rather haggle over £5m than sell to Mansour. Cheers you wobbling mound of whale spunk)
Are there any rising stars in the squad that we might not have heard of?
The best prospect we have at the moment is off to Carlisle for some 1st team experience. Adam Campbell has done really well at each level and has looked intelligent on the ball when he's had his brief cameos. He won the same MVP award as Messi and Iniesta for the Nike Cup (or something like that), but we all know that looking good as a kid, doesn't necessarily mean anything. Sammy Ameobi is worth a follow on twitter, but I'm not sure he'll make it. Quicker and trickier than his older brother, he still doesn't strike me as a player who'll do more than be on the fringes of our team for a while, then join a string of fair to middling Championship sides. Dummett is decent, but like Sammy, he'll probably fall short of making the grade.
Your Achilles heel?
Paper thin squad, tactically limited manager, rumours of infighting, ex-players having digs at the French contingent, an owner who won't spend any money, a Director of Football who may honestly be mentally unwell, a fan-base that is sprinting towards apathy, a Club Captain who may very well want away at the drop of the hat.....
We could probably do with a new right back as well.
In all seriousness it's goals. Demba Ba finished our top goal scorer last season. Cisse scored 8 last season and if Remy doesn't play to the standard he set last year we may find it increasingly difficult to stay out of trouble.
If you could have any City player in your team who would you choose?
We're weakest up front, so it'd have to be one of your 4/5 top class strikers. I like Dzeko, Aguero is just a beautiful player to watch... but realistically, I'd try and get Sinclair on loan. An attacking line up of 3 or 4 from Cisse, Remy, Ben Arfa, Sinclair & Gouffran would make me a lot more confident about the season to come.
What is your perception of City as a club?
You're like the hard-working local builder that won the lottery and becomes a property magnate. The leg-up the new owners gave you propelled you into the upper echelons of English football, but it's not like you were a none-entity before. Vocal, and mainly local support has always marked you as a decent away day and decent visitors to our fair (wet) and fine (alcoholic) city. A lot is made of the mega-rich oil barons buying you and changing your fortunes. Yet, Jack Walker did it for Blackburn, Hall did it for us, Abramovic is doing it for Chelsea, secret money men are trying to do it for Tottenham. It's nowt new, it's just that you're the most recent. I think if Mansour had bought Fulham, or Stoke other fans may have been a bit more put out because they're not what I'd think of as a "proper football club" but Man City, Everton, Newcastle ... no one could really begrudge us if that had happened. I've liked the two times I've visited the Etihad, (once with us and once with AFC Wimbledon v Luton in the play off final) but it's a bit of a tek and there needs to be more pubs around the ground.
Likely starting XI for the game, and score prediction?
Krul
Debuchy Coloccini (c) Yanga-Mbiwa (or Steven Taylor) Santon
Ben Arfa Sissoko Cabaye Tiote Jonas
Cisse
"We'd take a 1-1 draw"
I'd take a 1-0 loss if you offered it now. We're going to get humped, plain and simple. No confidence, no new players, no new ideas (we're still lumping it to the back post from every corner to no effect), no chance.
