Post Something Interesting

calumdown said:
when you joined you half expected to be reading about my testicles?

i must say this is all news to me.
i wonder how many other people thought about them when they first joined bluemoon.
i don't even know if it's a good or a bad thing.
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Hahaha, well perhaps not quite how I meant it when you put it like that.
 
calumdown said:
a married mate of mine used to go out with a high-end hooker.

he had always secretly confessed to his pals about wanting to lie underneath a glass table masturbating while watching a woman having a poo.

then the internet arrived and he went on something called adultwork.
lo+behold his fantasy could come true with someone by the name of kat.
a few of us chipped in for his birthday.

anyroad,
funnily enough they got on really well and started seeing each other.
to the point that he would on occasion help her out with work if a client wanted a man there too.

seemingly she was very very expensive when stuff got weird.
she was properly loaded but for some reason fell for the bit of rough that is my mate,
a scruffy **** who drums in a punk band but is very well-spoken.
plus he has a decent girth, which apparently is what ladies of the night desire from a boyfriend.

we used to go for ales a couple times a week.
at one point i had to ask him to stop telling me what he had done with her since i last saw him because some of it was the sort of thing you really don't want to think about.

then his wife found out,
sold the house and divorced him.
he spent his half in less than a year haha.

his girlfriend offered to get him a nice place to live,
but he dossed down in his recording studio and licked his wounds.

he stopped seeing his really fit much younger soulmate girlfriend.
he asked his ex for forgiveness and moved into her new house.

i'm not sure if there is a moral to this anecdote about poo.
the reason i mention it is because i had a message from him last night saying simply...

kat's been in touch (with appropriate emoji)
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Steve Nicol?
 
Blue Mist said:
And just a quick mention to the bravery of the fire brigade*
They are running in as those that can, run out.

*that was murder to type.
Firemen, no can put that these days, fire person, no that sounds stupid, fire officer ! No thats even worse.

Oh and aa you say, scary shit
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They call them Fire fighters now I believe.
 
calumdown said:
a married mate of mine used to go out with a high-end hooker.

he had always secretly confessed to his pals about wanting to lie underneath a glass table masturbating while watching a woman having a poo.

then the internet arrived and he went on something called adultwork.
lo+behold his fantasy could come true with someone by the name of kat.
a few of us chipped in for his birthday.

anyroad,
funnily enough they got on really well and started seeing each other.
to the point that he would on occasion help her out with work if a client wanted a man there too.

seemingly she was very very expensive when stuff got weird.
she was properly loaded but for some reason fell for the bit of rough that is my mate,
a scruffy **** who drums in a punk band but is very well-spoken.
plus he has a decent girth, which apparently is what ladies of the night desire from a boyfriend.

we used to go for ales a couple times a week.
at one point i had to ask him to stop telling me what he had done with her since i last saw him because some of it was the sort of thing you really don't want to think about.

then his wife found out,
sold the house and divorced him.
he spent his half in less than a year haha.

his girlfriend offered to get him a nice place to live,
but he dossed down in his recording studio and licked his wounds.

he stopped seeing his really fit much younger soulmate girlfriend.
he asked his ex for forgiveness and moved into her new house.

i'm not sure if there is a moral to this anecdote about poo.
the reason i mention it is because i had a message from him last night saying simply...

kat's been in touch (with appropriate emoji)
Click to expand...
Got a chunky lined up for him? ;-)
 
calumdown said:
a married mate of mine used to go out with a high-end hooker.

he had always secretly confessed to his pals about wanting to lie underneath a glass table masturbating while watching a woman having a poo.

then the internet arrived and he went on something called adultwork.
lo+behold his fantasy could come true with someone by the name of kat.
a few of us chipped in for his birthday.

anyroad,
funnily enough they got on really well and started seeing each other.
to the point that he would on occasion help her out with work if a client wanted a man there too.

seemingly she was very very expensive when stuff got weird.
she was properly loaded but for some reason fell for the bit of rough that is my mate,
a scruffy **** who drums in a punk band but is very well-spoken.
plus he has a decent girth, which apparently is what ladies of the night desire from a boyfriend.

we used to go for ales a couple times a week.
at one point i had to ask him to stop telling me what he had done with her since i last saw him because some of it was the sort of thing you really don't want to think about.

then his wife found out,
sold the house and divorced him.
he spent his half in less than a year haha.

his girlfriend offered to get him a nice place to live,
but he dossed down in his recording studio and licked his wounds.

he stopped seeing his really fit much younger soulmate girlfriend.
he asked his ex for forgiveness and moved into her new house.

i'm not sure if there is a moral to this anecdote about poo.
the reason i mention it is because i had a message from him last night saying simply...

kat's been in touch (with appropriate emoji)
Click to expand...
I love reading about football.
 
Damocles said:
I thought that was an interesting post. There's a lot of deconstruct there.
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I thought it sounded like the start of a shaggy dog story…….
“And when he put the grandfather clock on my buttocks…..”
 
KS55 said:
I thought it sounded like the start of a shaggy dog story…….
“And when he put the grandfather clock on my buttocks…..”
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My favourite part was where she was conflicted over judging him because he willingly put celery up her arse.

Wonder if that counts towards her 5 a day?
 
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