Sarah Everard murder | Wayne Couzens given whole-life sentence

BobKowalski said:
Yes, there is a inbuilt cultural bias not to interfere. In times past it was permissible for a man to beat his wife and there are still echoes of that today.

I think, simply listening to people who are victims would help, rather than dismissing, or being unsympathetic, and encouraging people to talk about it. I imagine it is difficult for a man as the ‘hen pecked’ husband is the stuff of comedy, and likely to draw contempt as much as anything. It is interesting to see how society and cultural values shape our attitudes.

Sometimes, I think both men and women are stuck in rigid roles, imprisoned by society’s attitudes and norms that demand they live as society decrees rather than what suits them.
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I couldn't have put it better Bob spot on mate.

unfortunately whether it be power or not being wired as men who treat woman with the respect they more than deserve just don't get it and I must say if it was possible in an ideal world they should not be allowed to enter into a relationship with a woman but again in many of these scenarios they become woman haters and often that hate becomes aggressive until the law catch up with them.

Fortunately the vast majority do as its in their interests on a number of levels to do so but I am concerned that it appears that the number of sociopaths or people with sociopathic tendencies that tend to be male as a proportion of the worlds population appears to be on the increase.

I just couldn't imagine being in an arranged marriage for example and while I don't wish to stereotype cultural and religious norms some woman in particular who are treated as what we would describe as not even second class or untouchable as such outside the bedroom see the freedoms or different freedoms being offered in other countries and societies are naturally are drawn to this.

There is a lot wrong with living in a democracy and the rule of law but so far i reckon its the best mankind has had to offer but I am always open to other views.
 
bluejon said:
I guess i posted because i didn't think your post was particularly relevant for a thread that is specifically about the murder of a woman by a man who abused his position as a police officer.
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neither is broader assumptions, generalisations and accusations made about men on women. Stick to the topic about a specific murder by a police officer on both sides or accept it will be broadened on both sides, as is fair in those circumstances.
 
bluejon said:
I guess i posted because i didn't think your post was particularly relevant for a thread that is specifically about the murder of a woman by a man who abused his position as a police officer.
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I understand bluejon totally and its totally appropriate you would draw that conclusion but as you raised a couple of issues in your reply I thought I should let you know that life and relationships and are often complex and as Bob succinctly summarised are often governed by cultural and societal norms and their expectations on the citizen and the family.

What I won't cop is violence of any kind and violence for the sake of it as an expression of so called power of one over another be it in relationship or from a crazed unhinged individual no matter his occupation and the situation.

This ex cop if not clinically diagnosed as insane should be locked up for life and if so spend the rest of his life in an appropriate institution.

he didn't just abuse his position blue he murdered an innocent defenceless individual who trusted him and deserves the full force of the law for the lives he has ruined and the crime he has committed.

Nothing he gets will bring Sarah back and that's the biggest heart break of all.
 
mancity1 said:
I understand bluejon totally and its totally appropriate you would draw that conclusion but as you raised a couple of issues in your reply I thought I should let you know that life and relationships and are often complex and as Bob succinctly summarised are often governed by cultural and societal norms and their expectations on the citizen and the family.

What I won't cop is violence of any kind and violence for the sake of it as an expression of so called power of one over another be it in relationship or from a crazed unhinged individual no matter his occupation and the situation.

This ex cop if not clinically diagnosed as insane should be locked up for life and if so spend the rest of his life in an appropriate institution.

he didn't just abuse his position blue he murdered an innocent defenceless individual who trusted him and deserves the full force of the law for the lives he has ruined and the crime he has committed.

Nothing he gets will bring Sarah back and that's the biggest heart break of all.
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Thanks. At the age of 46 I hadn't quite worked that out yet. Thank god for your post.
 
bluejon said:
Thanks. At the age of 46 I hadn't quite worked that out yet. Thank god for your post.
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Sorry mate I am sure you have so apologies for stating the obvious although some waltz through life always thinking the best of everyone they come into contact with unfortunately to their demise in some cases.
 
BobKowalski said:
Yes, there is a inbuilt cultural bias not to interfere. In times past it was permissible for a man to beat his wife and there are still echoes of that today.

I think, simply listening to people who are victims would help, rather than dismissing, or being unsympathetic, and encouraging people to talk about it. I imagine it is difficult for a man as the ‘hen pecked’ husband is the stuff of comedy, and likely to draw contempt as much as anything. It is interesting to see how society and cultural values shape our attitudes.

Sometimes, I think both men and women are stuck in rigid roles, imprisoned by society’s attitudes and norms that demand they live as society decrees rather than what suits them.
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BobKowalski said:
Agreed. The power dynamic and imbalance, which invariably favours men is a crucial factor when discussing this issue.

It‘s not just a matter of physical strength, but economic power too. Back in the day, it was accepted practice that a woman needed a husbands written permission to open a bank account and there are still aspects of this today. Disparity in pay levels between men and women for example.
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Agree with the first post, the second almost contradicts the first and it’s clear you fell into the same trap as many in society do.
 
mancity1 said:
Sorry mate I am sure you have so apologies for stating the obvious although some waltz through life always thinking the best of everyone they come into contact with unfortunately to their demise in some cases.
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Fair enough, apology accepted. I'm unfortunately very aware of just how grim this side of life is. Not so much through direct personal experience, but through the experience of far too many people i know and care about.
 
bluejon said:
Fair enough, apology accepted. I'm unfortunately very aware of just how grim this side of life is. Not so much through direct personal experience, but through the experience of far too many people i know and care about.
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Likewise bluejon I am a pacifist I even squirm at intentional cyber bullying as I have seen what can happen first hand to people who are impacted by it who many say they should just grow a pair.

Physical violence all too often is a result of mental torment and often as you alluded to earlier its about the balance of power and power comes in many forms.
 
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