Schoolyard Songs

[noely]

Which were your favourite? I used to love:

In the German nick,
Where they hang you by your dick,
And the rats play snooker with your baaaaalls.
When your mind goes blank,
And your that dying for a wank,
That you're drawing dirty pictures on the walls

I got a D merit in year 2 primary school when a top junior taught me that song and I went round singing
god bless st kents

 

[Lancet Fluke]

When I was about six lots of people sang "bum tit tit, bum tit tit, play the willy banjo."
I don't know if that is a British schoolyard classic or whether I just went to a school of mentals. There was also one about bubble gum and sticking it up your mothers bum. I suspect my school was full of weird children.

 

[law74]

Three German officers crossed the Rhine, [(taboo, taboo) is what we sang I swear]
Three German officers crossed the Rhine Taboo, Taboo
Three German officers crossed the Rhine,
To Shag the women and drink the wine.
Taboo, Tab-eye, Ta-bollocky eye, Ta-bollocky eye, Taboo.

Then I am sure there were other bits that had them wanking in the tank and shagging landlords daughters etc.

They came upon a wayside inn..
kicked down the door and walked right in...

The landlords daughter she was fair
Lillywhite tits and golden hair

xxxxxx
They shagged her till she was nearly dead

they brought her down a leafy lane....
and fucked her back to life again

and when they died they went to hell
fucked the devil and his wife as well

(though there may well be other verses as well that the passage of time strongbow and vodka have erased from my memory)

 

[Stuuuuuu]

Milk, milk, lemonade.
Chocolate round the corner.
Put a penny in the slot,
Out comes a quarter.

_______________________


Ching chong Chinaman tried to milk a cow.
Ching chong Chinaman didn't know how.
Ching chong Chinaman pulled the wrong tit.
Ching chong Chinaman covered in shit.

 

[nobody can eat fifty eggs]

When I was about six lots of people sang "bum tit tit, bum tit tit, play the willy banjo."
I don't know if that is a British schoolyard classic or whether I just went to a school of mentals. There was also one about bubble gum and sticking it up your mothers bum. I suspect my school was full of weird children.

We sung the Willy Banjo song too! Don't know about the mothers bum one though :(

 

[Stuuuuuu]

Trebor mints are a minty bit stronger,
Stick 'em up your bum and they last a bit longer.

 

[moon]

There was an old woman of 92 parlez vous.
There was an old woman of 92 parlez vous.
There was an old woman of 92,
Did a fart and away it blew
Inky pinky parlez vous.


About 5 or 6 verses long

 

[Lancet Fluke]

Milk, milk, lemonade.
Chocolate round the corner.
Put a penny in the slot,
Out comes a quarter.
.

milk milk lemonade. How could I have forgotten that? Now that is a classic of epic proportions if ever there was one.

 

[blueshortshorts]

Used to be one in the early 80's whenever a kid went for a haircut .started with "skinhesd skinhead skinhead tough , what's it like to be a puff ..."..can't remember the rest

 

[Tricky Dickys Right Foot Shot]

Where the fuck did you people live??? In a high school musical film or something??

Break-time entertainment normally consisted of 2 random well hard numpties that wanted to prove something to everyone so took the time to kicking seven shades of shit out of eathother!