Strangest thing that has ever happened to you in a pub

[peoffrey]

A 10 minute conversation with a girl culminated with her leading me outside by my hand, taking me around the side of the Pub and sucking me off. She said she'd tried to seduce me the previous weekend but I was so pissed I can't remember meeting her. I saw her around a couple of times again but she acted like nothing had happened.

 

[scotty123]

My 2nd wife of 3 years wanted to go to my old drinking ground in Ashton i had my doubts as shes a bit of an Urmston snob but i thought why not so we went one Saturday night
After a few drinks around Ashton and a very very swift one in The Bowling Green i took her in The Prince Of Orange to meet the legendary piss head landlady ''Tits out Carol''
The place was heaving with a crappy DJ on and Carol was perched on her stool at the end of the bar pissed as a fart as usual and we edged our way over to her, ''whos the blonde'' she said shes got tits nearly as big as mine and promptly whips her top up and her tits come flopping out to cheers from everyone stood at the bar.
Her husband Roger who was serving behind the bar comes over and said put them away Carol hes seen them before, yeah she said but his Mrs hasnt and wheres the dog it wants its kebab, goes behind the bar and comes out with a manky dog draped over her shoulders and sways through the crowd with it outside to the kebab shop.
About 15 mins later shes back with the dog wrapped around her neck and gives it a big dog bowl with the kebab in at the end of the bar with people pouring beer in another bowl next to it, then a massive brawl breaks out on the dancefloor and the Mrs decides its time to go, she just sat there on the train back to town shellshocked muttering ''iv never seen a place like that in my life'' she has never asked to go to Ashton again !!

 

[gordondaviesmoustache]

My 2nd wife of 3 years wanted to go to my old drinking ground in Ashton i had my doubts as shes a bit of an Urmston snob but i thought why not so we went one Saturday night
After a few drinks around Ashton and a very very swift one in The Bowling Green i took her in The Prince Of Orange to meet the legendary piss head landlady ''Tits out Carol''
The place was heaving with a crappy DJ on and Carol was perched on her stool at the end of the bar pissed as a fart as usual and we edged our way over to her, ''whos the blonde'' she said shes got tits nearly as big as mine and promptly whips her top up and her tits come flopping out to cheers from everyone stood at the bar.
Her husband Roger who was serving behind the bar comes over and said put them away Carol hes seen them before, yeah she said but his Mrs hasnt and wheres the dog it wants its kebab, goes behind the bar and comes out with a manky dog draped over her shoulders and sways through the crowd with it outside to the kebab shop.
About 15 mins later shes back with the dog wrapped around her neck and gives it a big dog bowl with the kebab in at the end of the bar with people pouring beer in another bowl next to it, then a massive brawl breaks out on the dancefloor and the Mrs decides its time to go, she just sat there on the train back to town shellshocked muttering ''iv never seen a place like that in my life'' she has never asked to go to Ashton again !!

Pubs and characters like that are part of the fabric of this nation.

 

[MCFC-alan88]

Unfortunately.

 

[bernabias home shirt]

My 2nd wife of 3 years wanted to go to my old drinking ground in Ashton i had my doubts as shes a bit of an Urmston snob but i thought why not so we went one Saturday night
After a few drinks around Ashton and a very very swift one in The Bowling Green i took her in The Prince Of Orange to meet the legendary piss head landlady ''Tits out Carol''
The place was heaving with a crappy DJ on and Carol was perched on her stool at the end of the bar pissed as a fart as usual and we edged our way over to her, ''whos the blonde'' she said shes got tits nearly as big as mine and promptly whips her top up and her tits come flopping out to cheers from everyone stood at the bar.
Her husband Roger who was serving behind the bar comes over and said put them away Carol hes seen them before, yeah she said but his Mrs hasnt and wheres the dog it wants its kebab, goes behind the bar and comes out with a manky dog draped over her shoulders and sways through the crowd with it outside to the kebab shop.
About 15 mins later shes back with the dog wrapped around her neck and gives it a big dog bowl with the kebab in at the end of the bar with people pouring beer in another bowl next to it, then a massive brawl breaks out on the dancefloor and the Mrs decides its time to go, she just sat there on the train back to town shellshocked muttering ''iv never seen a place like that in my life'' she has never asked to go to Ashton again !!

Just that one quote alone is worse than anything that happened in the prince of orange mate :)

 

[MATCITY]

My 2nd wife of 3 years wanted to go to my old drinking ground in Ashton i had my doubts as shes a bit of an Urmston snob but i thought why not so we went one Saturday night
After a few drinks around Ashton and a very very swift one in The Bowling Green i took her in The Prince Of Orange to meet the legendary piss head landlady ''Tits out Carol''
The place was heaving with a crappy DJ on and Carol was perched on her stool at the end of the bar pissed as a fart as usual and we edged our way over to her, ''whos the blonde'' she said shes got tits nearly as big as mine and promptly whips her top up and her tits come flopping out to cheers from everyone stood at the bar.
Her husband Roger who was serving behind the bar comes over and said put them away Carol hes seen them before, yeah she said but his Mrs hasnt and wheres the dog it wants its kebab, goes behind the bar and comes out with a manky dog draped over her shoulders and sways through the crowd with it outside to the kebab shop.
About 15 mins later shes back with the dog wrapped around her neck and gives it a big dog bowl with the kebab in at the end of the bar with people pouring beer in another bowl next to it, then a massive brawl breaks out on the dancefloor and the Mrs decides its time to go, she just sat there on the train back to town shellshocked muttering ''iv never seen a place like that in my life'' she has never asked to go to Ashton again !!

Just that one quote alone is worse than anything that happened in the prince of orange mate :)

It went wrong just before that

 

[scotty123]

My 2nd wife of 3 years wanted to go to my old drinking ground in Ashton i had my doubts as shes a bit of an Urmston snob but i thought why not so we went one Saturday night
After a few drinks around Ashton and a very very swift one in The Bowling Green i took her in The Prince Of Orange to meet the legendary piss head landlady ''Tits out Carol''
The place was heaving with a crappy DJ on and Carol was perched on her stool at the end of the bar pissed as a fart as usual and we edged our way over to her, ''whos the blonde'' she said shes got tits nearly as big as mine and promptly whips her top up and her tits come flopping out to cheers from everyone stood at the bar.
Her husband Roger who was serving behind the bar comes over and said put them away Carol hes seen them before, yeah she said but his Mrs hasnt and wheres the dog it wants its kebab, goes behind the bar and comes out with a manky dog draped over her shoulders and sways through the crowd with it outside to the kebab shop.
About 15 mins later shes back with the dog wrapped around her neck and gives it a big dog bowl with the kebab in at the end of the bar with people pouring beer in another bowl next to it, then a massive brawl breaks out on the dancefloor and the Mrs decides its time to go, she just sat there on the train back to town shellshocked muttering ''iv never seen a place like that in my life'' she has never asked to go to Ashton again !!

Just that one quote alone is worse than anything that happened in the prince of orange mate :)

It must have been escaped loony and big fat munters night that night, it was 10 times worse than normal, whatever normal is for the Bowling Green

 

[Prestwich_Blue]

Not in the pub but coming out of one in an upmarket part of London one night when I was working down there.

Walking up to the top of the road I can see a bloke stood there who's clearly pissed out of his skull as he's all over the place. As I got nearer I realised it was former Chancellor Nigel Lawson. He was clutching the pedestrian barrier that stops you crossing and was trying to hail a taxi but everytime he let go he looked like he was going to fall over and had to grab on again.

I had to walk past him and said "Good evening" to which he replied very pleasantly "Good evening" still clutching onto the barrier with both hands and trying to stay upright.

 

[yerwot?]

Not in the pub but coming out of one in an upmarket part of London one night when I was working down there.

Walking up to the top of the road I can see a bloke stood there who's clearly pissed out of his skull as he's all over the place. As I got nearer I realised it was former Chancellor Nigel Lawson. He was clutching the pedestrian barrier that stops you crossing and was trying to hail a taxi but everytime he let go he looked like he was going to fall over and had to grab on again.

I had to walk past him and said "Good evening" to which he replied very pleasantly "Good evening" still clutching onto the barrier with both hands and trying to stay upright.

some of us would have been tempted.........: )

 

[waterloo blue]

Just remembered another,in the Junction on Turner Lane in Ashton one Sunday evening,when Jeff the landlord comes downstairs and throws his keys on the bar and says "it's all yours lads".
He then leaves the pub and me and my mates look at each other unsure what to do next until my mate Boothy did a ring round and it's on.
When the rep from the brewery arrived on Monday it looked like the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan,apparently they'd had words Sunday afternoon and Jeff had had Robbies up to here and decide to chuck it in.
My mate's a glazier for Tameside Glass and had a call from a pub in Limeside in Oldham,I was giving him a hand and we were replacing the windows as they'd all been smashed,I know I was suprised as well.
As we finished up along comes a bloke bandaged up to the elbows,don't bother lads I'll only do 'em again tonight.