Stupid things your bird has said

[kippaxwarrior]

I was watching Walking with Dinosaurs with an ex a few years ago. They showed some CGI footage of a Stegosaurus slowly dying on a beach, it was quite clever technology at the time.

The bird pipes up, "Oh, why doesn't the cameraman do something to help it".

That is Genius!!!

 

[PragueBlue]

A friend lost a five pound note and my girlfriend (at the time) asked "What colour is it?'.

 

[u2fme2]

does my arse look big in this

 

[talkativesprout]

not my bird but priceless, karl pilkington asked ricky what the evil monsters were called in Gremlins....stupidity is not a women monopoly

 

[liamctid]

"I didn't realise that putting foil in the microwave would set it on fire"

Not my bird, but I was a witness whilst at uni to hear this classic whilst the news was on:

To set the scene, there was something going down in Egypt (this is about 3 years ago, not the current warzone!)

Anna: Ben, what's Egypt?

Ben: It's, sorta like a country.

Anna: Oh.

How can a girl get to the age of 20 without knowing what Egypt is?!

 

[Feed-The-Goat]

My ex once asked me "Is Paris the capital of Rome"

Oh how i laughed......

i miss her :(

 

[talkativesprout]

"I didn't realise that putting foil in the microwave would set it on fire"

Not my bird, but I was a witness whilst at uni to hear this classic whilst the news was on:

To set the scene, there was something going down in Egypt (this is about 3 years ago, not the current warzone!)

Anna: Ben, what's Egypt?

Ben: It's, sorta like a country.

Anna: Oh.

How can a girl get to the age of 20 without knowing what Egypt is?!

my missus might counteract that statement with how can you get to 41 and not know how to clean a bog ?




i do know, you get a fucking wife, but shhh dont tell the cnut

 

[metalblue]

my mrs the other week had a puncture on her car:

Her: "Hope it doesn't need a new tyre, they should be able to repair it, it's only flat at the bottom"

Me: ".................................................bwaahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahaha................................hahahahahaahahahahhahaha"

 

[ono]

I was watching Walking with Dinosaurs with an ex a few years ago. They showed some CGI footage of a Stegosaurus slowly dying on a beach, it was quite clever technology at the time.

The bird pipes up, "Oh, why doesn't the cameraman do something to help it".

Lmao

 

[talkativesprout]

One just came to me (so many i switch off).

Wife- whens he doing the roof.

Me - dont know love he is a one man band, when he has time

Wife - cant he get one of his lads to do it ?