The old follow through

A mate of mine who is quite a piss head went out and had 12 pints of Guinness as you do. Next day at work he felt he stomach bubbling away and headed for the loo. As it started dribbling out of his arse on the way he decided to get in the car and drive home. This had no effect on plugging his arsehole as the shit continued to pour out as he was driving home. By the time he arrived it was down to both ankles and had begun to dry out so looked like the bottom of dried out river bed. He only had a bath at his flat and took ages to cleanse himself of the pure black shit.
 
i was at the bus stop the other week engaging in a bit of 'small talk' with a complete stranger in his fifties , and stood near us were about five or six women ..... all of a sudden, and without any prior warning, he rattles off a lengthly fart of such velocity that every one of the women looked around in complete shock , one dropped her shopping bag on the ground , and another almost fell over!

But the guy seemed completely undeterred by his actions ... he just shook his trouser leg a couple of times , shouted 'that's better' , and just carried on with our conversation as though fuck all had happened !

The women finished up all gabbing away to each other , pointing fingers at him, and calling him all the filthy names under the sun!


vienna-man-charged-for-farting.jpg
 
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Trevor Morley's Tache said:
I have full on sh*t myself at work.

After a particularly heavy session, and a dodgy burger the night before, I was working outside. I bent down to pick something up, and without warning i jettisoned about half a litre of brown magma into the left leg of my overalls, right in front of the boss, who luckily didn't notice. I just carried on regardless until he buggered off, then got showered, changed and threw my overalls in the bin.
Click to expand...
and threw my overalls in the bin.
I hope you put them in the correct coloured bin,ie..recycling garden waste,lol
 
Ancoats blue said:
i was at the bus stop the other week making a bit of 'small talk' with a complete stranger in his fifties , and stood near us were about five or six women ..... all of a sudden, and without any prior warning, he rattles off a fart of such velocity that every one of the women looked around in complete shock , one dropped her shopping bag on the ground , and another almost fell over!

But the guy seemed completely undeterred by his actions ... he just shook his trouser leg a couple of times , shouted 'that's better' , and just carried on with our conversation as though fuck all had happened !

The women were gabbing away to each other , pointing at him, and calling him all the names under the sun!
Click to expand...
No dog knocking around that you, sorry, that bloke could pin the blame on?
 
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