What's the most drunk you've ever been?

Hell I take me two puny stories back, I have never been as pissed as some of you lot.

Thinking the same.

One of mine was in Paris 5 years ago. I was staying in a hostel with a friend and was already hammered by the time I got chatting to a group of people from Lancashire, and we discovered there was a club in the basement of the hostel. I got royally trashed. Last thing I remember was having a cig outside and seeing double - I always thought this was just something you saw in cartoons. Woke up locked in a disabled bathroom the next day, vomit everywhere, had a bruised chest and was bleeding from my head ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
 
Not the most drunk ever but just as the train doors opened for my exit, I threw up all over the carriage. Only one thing for it: fcuk off quick before anyone reacted.

Tame compared to other posters’ exploits though.
 
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18th birthday drinking all day, it was a Friday night woke up on the Saturday morning expecting to feel as rough as fuck but felt fine was playing football on the Saturday afternoon walked into the changing room smelt the linament and promptly threw up and didn't stop all afternoon was so ill couldn't play gave up booze for a year after that !!!!
 
Went on a night out with a group from work including a woman I was casually dating after recently getting divorced. Another woman was sat opposite me and we got on great, laughing and joking but nothing more than that. I gradually got more and more drunk on pints of cider and black with shots of sambuca dropped in them until I couldn’t walk and needed to be taken home by the woman I was dating. Once out of the taxi she tore into me for flirting with the other woman and wouldn’t accept my genuine claims of innocence, so just to stop an almighty row in the street I asked her to marry me! I woke up the next morning unable to move my head and with no clue how to get out of the mess I was in. I was due into work that morning (at an animals refuge) and spent half my time throwing my ring up while trying to scoop up dog shit and then got kicked by a donkey in the afternoon because I wasn’t paying attention. I never did talk my way out of the marriage either.
 
Was on a stag weekend which involved a train beer crawl. After the last pub went to jump on the steam train, missed, smashed my head and glasses on the open door and fell half between the train and platform. Mates pulled me up, broke my glasses, 2 broken ribs, out like a light, which I found out about at the hospital the next day when I woke up.

Apparently Stella with whiskey chasers all day will do that to a man.
 
Wouldn't want to share it. I've been in some disgraceful states. If I had anything about me I'd be embarassed....

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Came home from Uni and went out with some old mates from school Christmas Eve. Got blotto then came home and topped it off with a load of port and cherry. Slept it off, went and puked a few times in the toilet. Repeated about two or three times. Went downstairs and it was dark and the clock showed 4 o'clock. I thought is it 4.am Christmas morning or 4p.m. in the afternoon. When I got into the kitchen my mum told me that it was actually 4 a.m. Boxing Day and that my christmas dinner was in the fridge.
 

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