Stupid little things that bug you

Psychedelic Casual said:
Poor grammar in adverts.

Rightmove; “Find your happy”.
Apple; “Think different”.
Subway; “East fresh”.
Mercedes-Benz’s; “More power, more style, more technology, less doors”.
Toyota; “Start your impossible”.
Deliveroo; “Eat your amazing”.
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Not quite the same thing, but I did see a funny sign in a restaurant that was trying to extend the idea of "No shirt, no shoes, no service", but hadn't been thought through very carefully. The sign read "No shirt, no shoes, no pets, no service".
 
Supermarket packs of bacon with a special corner marked, “Open Here,” where the plastic film lid is left unbonded to the slightly thicker plastic base- to facilitate opening of said pack.
Except it never fucking does...
The bloody corner just rips off and you have to open the pack with a knife- just like every other sodding pack that’s gone before. Yet each new pack you think,
“this could be the one”- the one pack which opens in a convenient manner as promised. Maybe the packaging manufacturers have finally stopped sticking the fucking lid down with the same glue they use to fix heatproof tiles to the bloody space shuttle."
 
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British TV characters, whether set in present day, 1960s or even hundreds of years ago who say 'sorry for your loss'. Especially when delivered in in a flat couldn't give a fuck way.
 
DazWA9 said:
Supermarket packs of bacon with a special corner marked, “Open Here,” where the plastic film lid is left unbonded to the slightly thicker plastic base- to facilitate opening of said pack.
Except it never fucking does...
The bloody corner just rips off and you have to open the pack with a knife- just like every other sodding pack that’s gone before. Yet each new pack you think, “maybe this is the one”- the one pack which opens in a convenient manner as promised. Maybe the packaging manufacturers have finally stopped sticking the fucking lid down with the same glue they use to fix heatproof tiles to the bloody space shuttle.
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“I’ll get this one, I’m going to get it, come on you little pack of salty smokey meaty fatty deliciousness...... *RIP*... fucking shyite, it’s done it again, bag’o’shit these packs, fucking daft cunty bacon!”
 
The words “just sending a gentle reminder” in an email.

Fucking “gentle”? Just say reminder!
 
train companies that put their 3 carriage sets on to depart from major stations at rush hour and then 5 car sets to turn up at 10pm.

Airlines and train companies that have part of the fleet which they still haven't painted in their new liveries.

Ambulances that sneak up behind you and then turn their siren on.
 
mscenterh750 said:
My wife sat next to me after coming in tonight. I was watching the game and she said “which team is which?”

Divorce time I think.
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I thought it was just me..!

Just about to kick off and the tannoy is blasting out 'Everywhere and somewhere baby, that's where it's at... Hi Oh.. then the lyrics cut out and the Wednesday fans all sing "SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY" ..

The wife says, "you not joining in with the singing then ?"

"But they're the fans of the team we're playing" I say..

"But all the ones singing are wearing blue in the stand..!!"


I need to get my 2 bedroom flat sorted out pronto..!
 
nimrod said:
Life's funny, since I emigrated 35 years ago I've been saying cinemas and movies I'd forgotten the word pictures meaning cinema, I remember saying it when I was young in stalybridge but had forgotten all about it till you said it lol.
Australia seems to be a hybrid of English words and American words I mean we call a lift, a lift, not an elevator, and we don't say sidewalk, parking lots or gas. We do say freeway and sedans though.
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There's no picture house in Stalybridge anymore...
 
Big Swifty said:
When you go into a pub and find, to your delight, several handpumps. But when you want to read the clips, with a description of the ale (esp. the ABV), there's a pair of twats perched on stools blocking your view of the beer clips, when there's plenty of seats in the place anyway. So you either have to push your way between them or take a gamble.

Just shift, you anti-social selfish bastards.
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Carling and gin drinkers are the usual culprits.
No loitering at the bar
Lol.
 
Bill the Blue said:
I thought it was just me..!

Just about to kick off and the tannoy is blasting out 'Everywhere and somewhere baby, that's where it's at... Hi Oh.. then the lyrics cut out and the Wednesday fans all sing "SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY" ..

The wife says, "you not joining in with the singing then ?"

"But they're the fans of the team we're playing" I say..

"But all the ones singing are wearing blue in the stand..!!"


I need to get my 2 bedroom flat sorted out pronto..!
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My Mrs is barred from watching City on the TV with me as I say she is a jinx. It doesn’t stop her popping in and saying what’s the score as she looks at the TV. If they are losing she says, you should be beating them.She then does an about turn as she gets no response.but cannot resist saying.... “Oh Dear someone’s going to be in a bad mood later” on the way out. It is so infuriating.
 
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DazWA9 said:
Supermarket packs of bacon with a special corner marked, “Open Here,” where the plastic film lid is left unbonded to the slightly thicker plastic base- to facilitate opening of said pack.
Except it never fucking does...
The bloody corner just rips off and you have to open the pack with a knife- just like every other sodding pack that’s gone before. Yet each new pack you think,
“this could be the one”- the one pack which opens in a convenient manner as promised. Maybe the packaging manufacturers have finally stopped sticking the fucking lid down with the same glue they use to fix heatproof tiles to the bloody space shuttle."
Click to expand...

Change that for toothpaste. Ever since those bastards tried to blackmail companies by contaminating the products, they have put a film over the top. I can never get the sodding thing off and resort to sticking a knife through it so that the toothpaste comes out in a right state.
 
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