Have you, or anybody you know, got the virus yet?

[Magicpole]

We hoped our morons would leave but they voted to stay ;-)

That's morons for you.

 

[lafitz2008]

Just heard my good friend Tom Hanks has it, along with his wife.

My sister was due to fly to NY on Saturday. After the Moron in Chiefs travel ban from Europe, it's unclear if she will be able to go.

He didn't look well in Philadelphia

 

[Bill Walker]

Wife's hairdresser has it.
Came back from Iran and did 40 clients before falling sick.

 

[Ban-jani]

@karen7 how are you getting on?

 

[kaz7]

@karen7 how are you getting on?

the dippers made me cough and laugh at the same time,coughed literally all night,thought they had cured me but alas no

 

[snorky]

I'll be in Paisley next week. I can lay my hands on some Andrex at a price, if you want. As long as you're not fussy about the colour.

I don't think wearing that will offer much protection mate.

 

[idahoblues]

No, just the bad cat Aids

 

[west didsblue]

Luckily my IQ is in the high 50's so for now I can remain.

You need an IQ above 70 to not be a moron according to the scale used in the early 20th century. At least you’re smarter than an idiot or an imbecile so it’s not all bad news.

 

[MCFC1993]

60 hours after ringing 111, I'll have an appointment to see a doctor tonight. It's not been bad enough to go into a&e and I didn't want to sit and wait in a walk in centre as that's good for nobody.

Started out with a slightly warm temp, then a touch of shivering, then a sore throat and then a sore chest, then sneezing. Now it's just solely a bad cough, sore chest and slightly sore throat with the odd sneeze.

Thought it could be tonsillitis originally as I've been prone to that in the past but I think it's definitely some form of flu.

I'm 26 and only underlying medical condition is IBS, so think I'll be fine but worried about family around me who might not be.

Chances are I probably won't even get tested for it tonight either.

 

[Magicpole]

You need an IQ above 70 to not be a moron according to the scale used in the early 20th century. At least you’re smarter than an idiot or an imbecile so it’s not all bad news.

That's good to know. I think I might run in the 20/20 presidential campaign. It seems morons make up the majority of the US. They will probably think I'm a savant. Which compared to most I fucking would be. And I will promise not to,

1. Shag a pornstar.
2. Be a traitor.
3. Dodge the draft four times.
4. Tweet to the world to illustrate how stupid I and the country truly is.
5. I won't award myself billions in tax breaks.
6. I won't appoint a VP who believes dinosaurs were human pets
7. I won't get to be a fat ugly **** with an orange face.
8. I won't tell people I know everything better than anybody else. Even though I do.
9. I will not be a racist ****.
10. I will jail Trump and all his fellow traitors for failing to allow the evidence to impeach him.
11. All of Trump's family will be exiled to.one if his dad's favourite "shithole" countries without a dime.
12. I will personally shoot both his sons in the head for their Big Game Hunting. After I batter the two cunts to a pulp.

If that isn't a winning ticket then America is more fucked than I thought.

 

[The Black Shed]

Nope, nothing, nada. But I would be interested in buying a test kit - do they even exist yet?

 

[smevchenko]

Wife is a community nurse, she had to self-isolate for 24 hours as someone at a house she visited was then later tested for the virus. Result came back negative, so off she goes back to work, where this situation will no doubt arise again!

 

[Ban-jani]

60 hours after ringing 111, I'll have an appointment to see a doctor tonight. It's not been bad enough to go into a&e and I didn't want to sit and wait in a walk in centre as that's good for nobody.

Started out with a slightly warm temp, then a touch of shivering, then a sore throat and then a sore chest, then sneezing. Now it's just solely a bad cough, sore chest and slightly sore throat with the odd sneeze.

Thought it could be tonsillitis originally as I've been prone to that in the past but I think it's definitely some form of flu.

I'm 26 and only underlying medical condition is IBS, so think I'll be fine but worried about family around me who might not be.

Chances are I probably won't even get tested for it tonight either.

Weve got an office of 25 people mate, most 23-30 and 3 are off, with one in total isolation now and 1 being tested.

It’s going to get to the stage where most get this I think.

 

[aguero93:20]

I bet you blame the cats,y medieval ****.

Damn right, horrible little rats.

 

[sir baconface]

I’ve read some people don’t have symptoms

Fcukinell. I think I must have it.

 

[Magicpole]

Damn right, horrible little rats.

We need to sit down over 10 or 12 pints and talk this through ya mad ****.

 

[Magicpole]

According to the boffins who gave an update beside Johnson, up to 80% could catch it with a mortality rate around 1% dying. I will leave you all to do the maths but it's tens of thousands.

 

[Cheer Up Peter Reid]

According to the boffins who gave an update beside Johnson, up to 80% could catch it with a mortality rate around 1% dying. I will leave you all to do the maths but it's tens of thousands.

66 million = 528,000!

 

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

I'm as clean as a Ferny tackle or City's Uefa accounts!

 

[East Level 2]

The daughter of a colleague sits next to a girl in maths lectures who has had a fever since she returned from Italy a couple of weeks ago.
Fortunately we've been working from home so I haven't seen the colleague.