Joke thread

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

If he published his life story, would it be called "Fangs for the Mammaries" ?

It would be a book that you could really get your teeth into

 

[LWashington]

It would be a book that you could really get your teeth into

Especially the chapter which begins, "I had to be careful not to molar, there was a lot at stake".

 

[Bigg Bigg Blue]

Especially the chapter which begins, "I had to be careful not to molar, there was a lot at stake".

Fangs for that :)

 

[Sam Armstrong]

 

[Sam Armstrong]

 

[Sam Armstrong]

 

[jimharri]

Come on @Lavinda Past ,that clip of the bloke getting hit by three bricks must be good for a few gags.

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

Today marks 4 weeks without sugar. Running 5 miles a day, no meat, dairy or flour. No caffeine.

The change has been fantastic…

I don't know whose status this is from but I was so impressed and so proud of them, I decided to copy and paste!

 

[Lavinda Past]

My friend took his stuffed dog to the Antiques Roadshow.

He asked, "What do you think it will fetch?"

They replied, "Well, it won't be sticks!"

 

[Lavinda Past]

A newlywed calls her mother sobbing.

Mom: Honey what’s wrong?

Newlywed: Mom, it’s awful, John just had an accident at work and cut off his finger.

Mom: Oh no! That’s awful! His whole finger?

Newlywed: No, the one next to it.

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Uwe Already]

I started reading a book about zero gravity - it’s so good, I just can’t put it down!

 

[Vienna_70]

In a recent survey to establish which city English people consider the country’s second, people in Liverpool said, "Liverpool," people in Birmingham said, "Birmingham," and people in Manchester said, "London".

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[Lavinda Past]

 

[SCEtoAUX]

View attachment 127094

Nope, don't get that one.

 

[jimharri]

Nope, don't get that one.

Didn't Hitler used to do a spot of painting?

 

[SCEtoAUX]

Didn't Hitler used to do a spot of painting?

Ah yes he did.