Getting old

How are you coping with it?

Had a good few tonight, granted.

By my user name, I’m now mid 50s. This week I’ve been to a funeral of a friend’s relative who was in their 60s. I have a friend dying of cancer and another in a stroke ward who was fine until this time last week.

Today I went for a walk and it was a park run in chaddy park. A lot of men older then me, running and all these bright young things loving life.

I don’t like getting old. How you all
Coping with it?
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated
 
How are you coping with it?

Had a good few tonight, granted.

By my user name, I’m now mid 50s. This week I’ve been to a funeral of a friend’s relative who was in their 60s. I have a friend dying of cancer and another in a stroke ward who was fine until this time last week.

Today I went for a walk and it was a park run in chaddy park. A lot of men older then me, running and all these bright young things loving life.

I don’t like getting old. How you all
Coping with it?

You're the youngest you will ever be, embrace it!
 
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated

Apologies and communicate your feelings with her? Try and reconcile?
 
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated
No idea what your mistakes are , however if you tell her what you have just wrote above it would be a starting point to her realising a separation isn't what you want.
 
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated
Same situation I was in, albeit it ten years younger. At the folks, where I’d not lived for decades.

If it’s a trial, surely there’s hope? I would imagine she is feeling the exact same, given how long you’ve been together. What I would say, which I’m sure you know, is give her space. Your mistakes are your business, but if they’ve contributed to this situation now, she will need that space to figure out things from her side.

Whilst she’s doing that, get out. Do things you wouldn’t normally, even if you don’t want to. Figure things out from your perspective too. Time will tell, and I hope it works out for you mate.
 
Same situation I was in, albeit it ten years younger. At the folks, where I’d not lived for decades.

If it’s a trial, surely there’s hope? I would imagine she is feeling the exact same, given how long you’ve been together. What I would say, which I’m sure you know, is give her space. Your mistakes are your business, but if they’ve contributed to this situation now, she will need that space to figure out things from her side.

Whilst she’s doing that, get out. Do things you wouldn’t normally, even if you don’t want to. Figure things out from your perspective too. Time will tell, and I hope it works out for you mate.
Thanks for that pal, great words that give me hope
 
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated
Pub.
 
I'm the same as you mate, mid fifties was fine until a few days ago when my life was turned upside down when me and my wife of 33 years decided on a trial separation( my mistakes). I'm now at my mum and dad's who are both in their 80's, and I'm feeling as though my world has come crashing right down. I can't see a future without her at the minute and that is playing on my mind constantly. Any advice from anyone would be much appreciated
Hi mate sorry to hear about your issues,this may not be for you but I attended a few sessions of Andy’s man club a few years ago with some other issues,and the story you have is quite common for men and I do remember thinking it was quite soothing for me to talk to other men about this type of situation,quite empowering at times,as I say it may not be your thing,just thought I would mention it,as it’s non judgmental and a safe space to talk if needed.
 
Same situation I was in, albeit it ten years younger. At the folks, where I’d not lived for decades.

If it’s a trial, surely there’s hope? I would imagine she is feeling the exact same, given how long you’ve been together. What I would say, which I’m sure you know, is give her space. Your mistakes are your business, but if they’ve contributed to this situation now, she will need that space to figure out things from her side.

Whilst she’s doing that, get out. Do things you wouldn’t normally, even if you don’t want to. Figure things out from your perspective too. Time will tell, and I hope it works out for you mate.
Great post. Some good advice there too. I’d highlight/recommend those 4 words you used:
‘Get out. Do things’
 
My guess is that most trial separations become permanent. Just a guess.
 
Growing old is f'kn awful mate, and so is your health deteriorating, but it's all part of the ageing process, and we can't prevent it happening ..... I'm 69 now, i go to the doctors and he's only got time to listen to one health complaint, when I could probably reel off half a dozen!
Spend more time attending doctors and hospitals appointments, it’s a merry go round
 
Hi mate sorry to hear about your issues,this may not be for you but I attended a few sessions of Andy’s man club a few years ago with some other issues,and the story you have is quite common for men and I do remember thinking it was quite soothing for me to talk to other men about this type of situation,quite empowering at times,as I say it may not be your thing,just thought I would mention it,as it’s non judgmental and a safe space to talk if needed.
Oh thanks mate, i might need just that. I'm at the lonely dark stage at this moment in time and need to be with and to talk to people
 
Oh thanks mate, i might need just that. I'm at the lonely dark stage at this moment in time and need to be with and to talk to people
The thing I liked was that there are other men in similar situations and often worse and you come away feeling lighter,I found,good luck blue.
 

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