Dear Atheists..

How is it that cavemen survived the asteroid but dinosaurs didn't ?




Just askin'
The great designer told them: “Get in your caves, lads, as I am about to sent fire and brimstone to destroy the dinosaurs. Those animals have severely annoyed me by wearing red scarves and supporting an ecumenical movement called Man United, which apparently is a call for human unity.
We can’t be having that, we need war and conflict and hatred. To that end I shall send an apocalypse called Peter Swales to earth. If you think the fire and brimstone are bad, wait till you see this lump of excrement. He will spread fear and despondency among my chosen people and cause them more than thirty years of hurt. But I am a benign dictator and there will arise a great blue saviour. And his name will be Mansour. I’m afraid he will be a filthy Arab drenched in oil, but you can’t have everything. Fear not my beloved cavemen, just wait a billion years. Five in a row will astonish the world and cause huge rivers of piss to cascade from roofs everywhere, yea even in Stretforge. You’ll see.”
 
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The great designer told them: “Get in your caves, lads, as I am about to sent fire and brimstone to destroy the dinosaurs. Those animals have severely annoyed me by wearing red scarves and supporting an ecumenical movement called Man United, which apparently is a call for human unity.
We can’t be having that, we need war and conflict and hatred. To that end I shall send an apocalypse called Peter Swales to earth. If you think the fire and brimstone are bad, wait till you see this lump of excrement. He will spread fear and despondency among my chosen people and cause them more than thirty years of hurt. But I am a benign dictator and there will arise a great blue saviour. And his name will be Mansour. I’m afraid he will be a filthy Arab drenched in oil, but you can’t have everything. Fear not my beloved cavemen, just wait a billion years. Five in a row will astonish the world and cause huge rivers off piss. You’ll see.”
God created man in his own image, but didn't foresee the Swales comb over or the TV rental business...
 
God created man in his own image, but didn't foresee the Swales comb over or the TV rental business...
“Oh, William of Oz, have more faith. I shall send Robinson, Lord of Radio Rentals, to destroy the Swales empire. He will make up for the lost income with a great scandal known as Swalesgate which will be a special entrance to the temple of Kippax. The shekels collected there will drop down a chute into Swales back pocket. But it will avail him nothing and he will be forced to pay for his groceries in Sixpences and Half Crowns which are heavy and that will cause his teeth to drop out.
As for the comb over, I shall invent that long before Swales, and my disciples will be Robert of Charlton and Ralph of Many Coloured Coates.”
 
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