Ever Thought About Suicide?

[mcfcliam]

its not often i open up on forums and tbh its taken 29 pages for me to decide to post this. Keep strong & keep motivated, even if that motivation is to just get out of bed in the morning

my missus started with post natal depression some 9 years ago, just after the first baby was born. She was initially prescribed tablets and to a certain extent they were working more often than not. Then when the second baby come along, it knocked her for 6 again.

Over the last 7 years, this has now developed into manic depression. They tried her on numerous tablets & she eventually quit the tablets as she ended up sitting in the house most days not even getting dressed. I even came home from work some days and the kids would still be in their jimjams and no food at 6pm, they'd not even been out of the house on school hols.

This weighs heavily on someone who has to leave the house to work, resulting in me making various calls home during the day to ensure she and the kids were alright.

For the last 9 years she has been unable to work and has panic attacks when faced with challenging situations, this has resulted in a total loss of confidence and self esteem, she is a shadow of the girl i once knew.

Over the last few years i have been lucky in the fact i have a decent job and can moderately earn for both of us and i can now work from home, allowing me to keep an eye on things a little better.

From first hand experience, it is not easy living and dealing with someone who suffers from depression, but love, care, understanding and an overwhelming desire to try and regain some of the person you once knew make the journey worthwhile.

Moving story mate.

Bless you shady and good luck to you and your family in the future.

 

[Ducado]

Well seems to be the thing to do, just to let people know they are not alone

I had an older cousin, who I idolised when I was a kid, he was great at everything he did, he was an art student, he was also a great sports man, one day he had an argument with my uncle, it was a silly argument over something and nothing, in the heat of the moment he took a large does of weed killer, to this day nobody knows if he intended to kill him self, he lasted a few days on life support, but he died I think he was 18 or 19, the case for some reason made the national newspapers, and Linda Lee Potter wrote a long article in the Daily mail about it, which caused further family upset, suffice to say my aunt and uncle and his two brothers were left devastated by it, and have never really recovered even after 30 years

 

[Bigga]

I'm going to sound like a wet cnut, but I seem to well up reading through these posts. Probably cos I thought I was 'over the hill' and the feelings of despair was behind me. Maybe they are and maybe I'm just glad that I'm here, but feel sad for those who are not.

I dunno what's in my head and in my heart, right now.

 

[gaudinho's stolen car]

I'm going to sound like a wet cnut, but I seem to well up reading through these posts. Probably cos I thought I was 'over the hill' and the feelings of despair was behind me. Maybe they are and maybe I'm just glad that I'm here, but feel sad for those who are not.

I dunno what's in my head and in my heart, right now.

Tough times Bigga, and all these accounts have been hard to read. But we are all on the same side thinking of each other and that's what's important.

 

[JoeMercer'sWay]

makes me feel like a prat to be honest, nothing can compare to losing a loved one/friend so tragically.

but it does give a sense of perspective, because what really troubles one person in their life can seem quite trivial to someone else. It's like the old thing about what do rich people have to be depressed about, but their lives are so totally different to the everyday person that their problems are just as tough to deal with.

I dunno, feel like I'm trying to justify me to myself reading through some of these stories.

 

[Ducado]

I'm going to sound like a wet cnut, but I seem to well up reading through these posts. Probably cos I thought I was 'over the hill' and the feelings of despair was behind me. Maybe they are and maybe I'm just glad that I'm here, but feel sad for those who are not.

I dunno what's in my head and in my heart, right now.

Your a right thinking compassionate human being, and that is a good thing, I just wish more people had compassion for their fellow man (or women)

 

[pauldominic]

its not often i open up on forums and tbh its taken 29 pages for me to decide to post this. Keep strong & keep motivated, even if that motivation is to just get out of bed in the morning

my missus started with post natal depression some 9 years ago, just after the first baby was born. She was initially prescribed tablets and to a certain extent they were working more often than not. Then when the second baby come along, it knocked her for 6 again.

Over the last 7 years, this has now developed into manic depression. They tried her on numerous tablets & she eventually quit the tablets as she ended up sitting in the house most days not even getting dressed. I even came home from work some days and the kids would still be in their jimjams and no food at 6pm, they'd not even been out of the house on school hols.

This weighs heavily on someone who has to leave the house to work, resulting in me making various calls home during the day to ensure she and the kids were alright.

For the last 9 years she has been unable to work and has panic attacks when faced with challenging situations, this has resulted in a total loss of confidence and self esteem, she is a shadow of the girl i once knew.

Over the last few years i have been lucky in the fact i have a decent job and can moderately earn for both of us and i can now work from home, allowing me to keep an eye on things a little better.

From first hand experience, it is not easy living and dealing with someone who suffers from depression, but love, care, understanding and an overwhelming desire to try and regain some of the person you once knew make the journey worthwhile.

That is what I call real love.

Stability is enormous for people and pragmatism is also important.<br /><br />-- Sun May 01, 2011 11:15 pm --<br /><br />

I'm going to sound like a wet cnut, but I seem to well up reading through these posts. Probably cos I thought I was 'over the hill' and the feelings of despair was behind me. Maybe they are and maybe I'm just glad that I'm here, but feel sad for those who are not.

I dunno what's in my head and in my heart, right now.

Tough times Bigga, and all these accounts have been hard to read. But we are all on the same side thinking of each other and that's what's important.

I agree.

 

[BlueInBury]

Fucking hell! I've avoided reading this thread because I've been feeling a bit shitty recently. My girlfriend who I'd been with for five years and lived with fucked off with some **** nugget she works with and it hit me pretty hard. But I've just read this right the way through and in a really weird way it's made me feel so much better. There's some fucking incredible people who've posted on this thread and all really brave for sharing it. It's helped me put my own shit in perspective a bit too. Huge respect to everyone on this thread.
Take care blues!

 

[Ricster]

I dont have a lot of people to talk to, maybe thats why i came on here and started to talk to people i dont know, i find it easier i suppose. As many of you know, my ex and myself split up about 4 weeks ago now, just cos i wouldn't tell her about some things that might hurt her, but when she finds out it hurts alot more. There is one person on this forum that knows the full story and i have PM'd him this morning.

Anyway the past couple of weeks have been up and down, the last week really up, or so i thought, she tells me she misses me, she still loves me, and when i saw her, her sister and her neice the other day and her neice ran upto me she started to cry, my ex that is.

Anyone who is a freind of mine on FB will understand just how far i go to release my inner frustrations, somewhere i can go and let it all out. But as usual, in good old FB style someone has run back and told her everything i've been writing. She thinks im making her out to be the arsehole, when in all honesty for the majority of the relationship, that title has been on my mantle.

Putting my life over FB is "pathetic", "Its a networking site, not a therapist" And after telling her about this thread, and how i suppose its my way of asking for help even though i wont admit it, she calls me "very very selfish".

She says i dont know what is important to her, but i do, i just need help because i am pretending to be someone im not and have done since the death of my Brother.

Sorry for being so deep this morning guys, but i can honestly say that this is the hardest day i have woken up to.

 

[FuZzY]

I dont have a lot of people to talk to, maybe thats why i came on here and started to talk to people i dont know, i find it easier i suppose. As many of you know, my ex and myself split up about 4 weeks ago now, just cos i wouldn't tell her about some things that might hurt her, but when she finds out it hurts alot more. There is one person on this forum that knows the full story and i have PM'd him this morning.

Anyway the past couple of weeks have been up and down, the last week really up, or so i thought, she tells me she misses me, she still loves me, and when i saw her, her sister and her neice the other day and her neice ran upto me she started to cry, my ex that is.

Anyone who is a freind of mine on FB will understand just how far i go to release my inner frustrations, somewhere i can go and let it all out. But as usual, in good old FB style someone has run back and told her everything i've been writing. She thinks im making her out to be the arsehole, when in all honesty for the majority of the relationship, that title has been on my mantle.

Putting my life over FB is "pathetic", "Its a networking site, not a therapist" And after telling her about this thread, and how i suppose its my way of asking for help even though i wont admit it, she calls me "very very selfish".

She says i dont know what is important to her, but i do, i just need help because i am pretending to be someone im not and have done since the death of my Brother.

Sorry for being so deep this morning guys, but i can honestly say that this is the hardest day i have woken up to.

Are you ok Ricster? I wish I could find the right words to help.

Has your ex read what you have said on your facebook and on here? I can't comment on anything thats on your FB account but your last post makes it pretty clear that you still have deep feelings for her. Perhaps she needs to sit down on her own, without any judgemental friend beside her and read this thread, and your last post.

Unfortunately not everybody understands that some people find it easier to talk to strangers, or find it much easier to express yourself in writing, or online as you have done. We don't all have someone close we can reach out to, or we don't like to burden them with how we feel, so talking to strangers becomes much easier. Some people cannot grasp the fact that other's can feel very down, maybe that's because they haven't experienced it themselves, maybe they just aren't true to themselves and are in denial, I don't know.

It's not selfish of you at all to express yourself as you have done, and this thread has proved so.

No matter how hard life is, what shit is thrown at us, we just have to find the courage from somewhere to keep going on, and I honestly believe this thread has helped more people than you know, so you keep posting your feelings, there's nothing wrong with it.

And most of all, stay strong, and that goes out to you all who have posted your feelings on here.