Ever Thought About Suicide?

[gaudinho's stolen car]

I haven't, but a lad that was in my year at school (I'm in college now) hung himself yesterday :( His mum died a few years ago and he's been having a real hard time recently! It's just tragic!

That's awful mate, my heart goes out to the rest of the family.

 

[Citizen52]

There has been a new therapy for depression that has proved very successful,

It is called Mindfulness Based Cognitive Behaviour Therapy

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.mbct.co.uk/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.mbct.co.uk/</a>

It's not a easy subject to talk about, but it is very common in all it's forms

Interesting you should've posted that, I was only recently looking at the moodgym website which is a similar sort of thing on an Australian website.

Despite some of the reservations and ill-judged remarks, I think this thread has been one of the better ones if it has promoted understanding of an uneasy subject.

 

[crizack]

ricster, i'd personally say 'no' and move on. You cant just let someone control your emotions as easily as that, give her something to work for, let her prove she wants to see you coz she loves you, not because she's 'missing' you.

just play it cool, pm her and say, ''nice to see you yesterday, i'm pretty busy for the next few weeks so if you still fancy going for dinner in the future, maybe we can arrange soething?'

you'll know if she is serious by her reply. dont let her know, she's taken priority in your thoughts', f she knows that, she's got what she wants. Girls crave 'wanting' and if they think they arent your main concern, she'll be begging you to get back with her in a few weeks. hard at first, but it works mate.

 

[BlueHammer85]

Hello lads,

just walked home to my mum and after a few hours sitting with her, i thought of this thread as i really believe my mum is suffering from a mental illness. i dont think she is considering suicide but its one thing im frightened off.

basically, ever since she split with her second husband my last step dad about 8 years ago - her paranoia has got worse, she has been on and off for last few years - reminds me very much of how stacey's mum was in Eastenders - can turn very easily.

i really dont know where her paranoia stems from but she believes people out there ''are playing games on her'' , its hard to describe this on a message. but she has been on a few dates and is convinced they have all been a set up from her old friends who she fell out with - lately its got alot worse, to the point she is sitting in bed making anagrams out of her last date and writing down weird coincidences ie: if they mention a colour or a country - she'll link it to something else.

Its so frustrating, im 100% sure that her old friends are not playing games on her and ive told her to stop being so paranoid. this makes her more upset as no one believes her. she literally has no friends, and i dont blame them - eventually she falls out with them and all of a sudden 'there part of a game'

on top of all this, her job prospects are not good and bills are piling up

Im literally the only one there for her

her mum and dad are very old and need care
her older brother is helping my nan and grandad

i have 2 brothers - who know the situation - but one does bar work pretty much every night and scrapes by living in a bedsit, the other lives far away and again just about scrapes by.

thats all she has.

i really think she has hit a dead end with no where to go, she has been to the bottom before and has managed to pull through, which is my only hope for her. but as she's approaching 60 its obviously going to take its toll

i do all i can. i pay rent, pay some bills, take her out and listen all i can. ive told her to speak to a doctor.

anyway, not sure what more advice i can get. but any help will do.

some moving stories on here and in a selfish way its comforting to know im not the only one who has there problems.

 

[JoeMercer'sWay]

Hello lads,

just walked home to my mum and after a few hours sitting with her, i thought of this thread as i really believe my mum is suffering from a mental illness. i dont think she is considering suicide but its one thing im frightened off.

basically, ever since she split with her second husband my last step dad about 8 years ago - her paranoia has got worse, she has been on and off for last few years - reminds me very much of how stacey's mum was in Eastenders - can turn very easily.

i really dont know where her paranoia stems from but she believes people out there ''are playing games on her'' , its hard to describe this on a message. but she has been on a few dates and is convinced they have all been a set up from her old friends who she fell out with - lately its got alot worse, to the point she is sitting in bed making anagrams out of her last date and writing down weird coincidences ie: if they mention a colour or a country - she'll link it to something else.

Its so frustrating, im 100% sure that her old friends are not playing games on her and ive told her to stop being so paranoid. this makes her more upset as no one believes her. she literally has no friends, and i dont blame them - eventually she falls out with them and all of a sudden 'there part of a game'

on top of all this, her job prospects are not good and bills are piling up

Im literally the only one there for her

her mum and dad are very old and need care
her older brother is helping my nan and grandad

i have 2 brothers - who know the situation - but one does bar work pretty much every night and scrapes by living in a bedsit, the other lives far away and again just about scrapes by.

thats all she has.

i really think she has hit a dead end with no where to go, she has been to the bottom before and has managed to pull through, which is my only hope for her. but as she's approaching 60 its obviously going to take its toll

i do all i can. i pay rent, pay some bills, take her out and listen all i can. ive told her to speak to a doctor.

anyway, not sure what more advice i can get. but any help will do.

some moving stories on here and in a selfish way its comforting to know im not the only one who has there problems.

is there anywhere she likes going? anywhere in old stories of her being a kid she has fond memories of? take her there and see if it re-wakens the old her.

I've never given that advice before so it's just a hunch, nothing proven, just maybe taking her away somewhere away from what she's used to that could be weighing her down might help.

 

[Lucky Toma]

Mark, its bad enough when someone has to deal with a peer going through such an awful time of it. To witness an offspring or parent suffer makes it probably a lot harder still.
You have my sympathies mate and I really hope things improve.

I guess the key thing is how does she respond if you bring up the word 'depression'?
Denial? Jokily brushing it off? Anger?
Because it definitely sounds, and I realise I only have your post to go on, that your ma could really benefit from seeing her GP and either being perscribed anti-depressants or a few sessions with a counsellor.

 

[LoveCity]

i really dont know where her paranoia stems from but she believes people out there ''are playing games on her'' , its hard to describe this on a message.

I've felt the same way and trust me, it can feel real. In my case over a 14 year span or so from when I was about 13, events in my life seemed almost scripted and predetermined. Without going into too many details many bad things happened and then when something good would appear, it turned out to be a false hope or followed by something very bad. As I got older it began to feel like there was some greater power deliberately playing a game with me. I still think it sometimes and I'm not sure if your mum is similar but she may justifiably feel like some force is playing with her life.

(And I know it probably all sounds crazy but I don't think I'm mentally ill [but have never seen a doctor] and have wondered a lot if certain people's lives are affected by forces beyond our knowledge - ie, past lives, karma from past lives, inherited curses, etc.)

Hope your mum can get past it though and get better.

 

[BlueHammer85]

JoeMercer - She loves coming up to London, sitting by Thames - chilling , i try and do that with her every couple weeks. but again, next day. all back to square 1.

Lucky Toma - thanks for the kind words, she knows she suffer's from depression, she admits that. i dont think she realises she suffers from Paranoia and maybe Bi Polar - she's had counselling in the past and i dont believe it helped her plus at this moment in time she wouldn't be able to afford it. Last night i told her to see a doctor

LoveCity - sorry to hear you suffer/suffered from that, must be horrible. her way of thinking is different to believing there's dark forces, curses , karma etc . she believes there's people (her old friends) playing games on her wherever she goes, ie: setting her up on dates and telling the bloke what to say. whenever she has a knockback in life she brings up that its because her 'old friends' have got there way. literally everyone she has dealings with she believes in some way are going out to make her life a misery. its complete rubbish.

 

[blue dallas]

Like doing it to yourself? I have on several occasions, but never actually done anything to go that extra step.
Not that i would anyway, but just wondered, why do those thoughts go through my head? Is it just me, or are there others too?

never would,
my dad committed suicide when i was 19, not good.
the devastation and grief it leaves on loved ones left behind is awful.

 

[pauldominic]

Hello lads,

just walked home to my mum and after a few hours sitting with her, i thought of this thread as i really believe my mum is suffering from a mental illness. i dont think she is considering suicide but its one thing im frightened off.

basically, ever since she split with her second husband my last step dad about 8 years ago - her paranoia has got worse, she has been on and off for last few years - reminds me very much of how stacey's mum was in Eastenders - can turn very easily.

i really dont know where her paranoia stems from but she believes people out there ''are playing games on her'' , its hard to describe this on a message. but she has been on a few dates and is convinced they have all been a set up from her old friends who she fell out with - lately its got alot worse, to the point she is sitting in bed making anagrams out of her last date and writing down weird coincidences ie: if they mention a colour or a country - she'll link it to something else.

Its so frustrating, im 100% sure that her old friends are not playing games on her and ive told her to stop being so paranoid. this makes her more upset as no one believes her. she literally has no friends, and i dont blame them - eventually she falls out with them and all of a sudden 'there part of a game'

on top of all this, her job prospects are not good and bills are piling up

Im literally the only one there for her

her mum and dad are very old and need care
her older brother is helping my nan and grandad

i have 2 brothers - who know the situation - but one does bar work pretty much every night and scrapes by living in a bedsit, the other lives far away and again just about scrapes by.

thats all she has.

i really think she has hit a dead end with no where to go, she has been to the bottom before and has managed to pull through, which is my only hope for her. but as she's approaching 60 its obviously going to take its toll

i do all i can. i pay rent, pay some bills, take her out and listen all i can. ive told her to speak to a doctor.

anyway, not sure what more advice i can get. but any help will do.

some moving stories on here and in a selfish way its comforting to know im not the only one who has there problems.

There's considerable evidence to suggest paranoia is at least partly genetic.

I can speak from personal experience because my grandma had, both my Mum and her elder sister have it, I have and so do two of my cousins.

However it is inflamed by situational factors like you say.

All that her GP will do is but her on medication which simply keeps the lid on it without curing it.

Things like CBT and NLP are really the best therapies, but the NHS waiting list is lengthy.

EDIT: She may still be grieving which is different from a mental illness.