Funniest thing you have heard at a match

i8rags said:
Used to sit in the old Maine stand, there was a bloke every game when we kicked off who used to shout "blow the final whistle" loud as he could.
Also in the days of Richard Edgehill same fella used to shout "Edgehill for England" every time it was quiet, always got a laugh out of me.
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An elderley gentleman, who use to sit near me there, everytime Joe Corrigan was about to take a goal kick or just boot it out of his hands, use to shout '' come on Joe, just pretend it's your mother-in-laws head!''

Also, I remember, around 1984/5 ish, playing Birmingham and David Seaman was in goals for them. At the time he had split up from his wife, the rumour being she had been having extra-marital affairs. So, poor old David got a good few blasts of:-...''she's here...she's there...she's every fuckin' where... Seamans' wife... Seamans' wife''
 
FORZA CITY said:
Around the early 00's I was at Luton v Peterborough on the opening day of whatever season is was. Peterborough took the lead after about 30 seconds. After the celebrations had died down the whole away end was jumping up and down chanting "WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE SAY WE ARE TOP OF THE LEAGUE"... 10/10 for quick thinking.
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standing at the back of the south stand 2seasons ago and this fella who,s been there all season and the one before had a young bird with him all the first half she repeatedley shouted CLOSE EM DOWN evan wen shay was rolling it out to r players after ten more outbursts during the sec/half my mate shouts close ur mouth witch she did she went as red as bacon face and never came back since oh joy.
 
i remember when we were playing shit and fans were wanting bradley wright phillips to be given a chance, someone shouted get his brother on, some bloke stood up and said "his brother ? stick his whole fuckin family on" made me chuckle
 
bluemc1 said:
i remember when we were playing shit and fans were wanting bradley wright phillips to be given a chance, someone shouted get his brother on, some bloke stood up and said "his brother ? stick his whole fuckin family on" made me chuckle
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LOL class
 
watching the England match last night at about 40 mins the tannoy fella made a loud, long and illedgible announcment and i swear i heard some English bloke shout "WOT!!" just before the crowd started to roar again

anyone else hear it or was it the weed?
 
In 117 someone was talking about Belgium being very lucky (VK, Fellani, Hazard etc) and a guy behind me piped up they weren't very lucky in 1941.
 
At the Madrid game this season and when we started to get on top of them, the cheating bastards started taking ages to take throw-ins - to run the clock down. Bloke behind me stood up and shouted "manyana dick-ed!". The funniest thing I've ever heard full stop, let alone at a match.

Also last season, can't remember who we were playing, but two plastic bags made it on to the pitch and the ref stopped play to pick them up. "He's got OCD" came a shout from behind me. Hilarious.
 
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