Ok so just a brief summary of the main parties
If you're voting Tory - You are a tax avoiding uncaring scumbag, you want to privatise the NHS and every other service, you believe sick people should be given a IKEA pack to build there own hospital beds and if you had the chance would tax your own Nan for using her wheelchair.
If you're voting Labour - You are jealous of the wealthiest and believe anyone rich should not be allowed to buy a house - you should be entitled to sit on your arse all day and get paid to watch Eggheads if you want - the minimum wage should be raised to £75 an hour, instead of cuts - we should pump £8000 billion into our NHS, schools and other services
If you're voting Lib Dems - You are a wet lettuce 'do gooder' that can't accept the Brexit vote.
If you're voting UKIP - you are not Racist 'but' ... believe Mosques should be burnt down, Muslims go back to there 'own country' (the ones born here should respect our laws) Everyone should have a St George's tattoo on there forehead and be able to sing 'England till I die' in foreign looking faces.
If you're voting Greens - You believe that leaving the bread in the toaster for too long will result in pollution, you are probably vegetarian and gay.
If you're voting SNP - you are Scottish, you hate England, you want to be independent but believe England should pay for everything in Scotland - you will watch Braveheart the night before the election downing bottles of Irn Bru in your uncles Kilt