lefty goldblatt
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Puts me in mind of that other similar gag.
Well, it's Father's Day, and dad will be looking down on us.
He's not dead.
Just arrogant
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
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Well, it's Father's Day, and dad will be looking down on us.
He's not dead.
Just arrogant
dronefromsector7G
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And the Stewart Francis gag :
"I dedicate this show to my dad who was a roofer. So dad, if you're up there...." (looks up slowly when doing the punchline)
blue44
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Bill Walker
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paddy went to the Dentist's to have a teeth pulled.
The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot.
"No way" ! No needles ! "I hate needles" !, paddy said.
The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and paddy immediately objected.
"I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me" !
The Dentist then asks him if he has any objection to taking a pill.
"No objection", paddy said. "I'm fine with pills".
The Dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet, paddy totally at a loss for words, said in amazement,
"WOW" ! "I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer" !
"It doesn't", said the Dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your feckin teeth out...
The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give him a shot.
"No way" ! No needles ! "I hate needles" !, paddy said.
The dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and paddy immediately objected.
"I can't do the gas thing either; the thought of having the gas mask on is suffocating me" !
The Dentist then asks him if he has any objection to taking a pill.
"No objection", paddy said. "I'm fine with pills".
The Dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra tablet, paddy totally at a loss for words, said in amazement,
"WOW" ! "I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer" !
"It doesn't", said the Dentist, "but it will give you something to hold on to when I pull your feckin teeth out...
Bill Walker
Well-Known Member
Paddy says to the psychiatrist, "Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it."
Can't sleep properly..
"Come to me three times a week for two years and I'l cure your fears," says the shrink. "And I'll charge you only £200 a visit."
paddy says he'll think about it. Six months later, he runs into the doctor, who asks why he never came back.
"For £200 a visit!?" says paddy. "my mate Mick cured me for free."
"Is that so! How?"
"He told me to cut legs off the feckin bed."..
Can't sleep properly..
"Come to me three times a week for two years and I'l cure your fears," says the shrink. "And I'll charge you only £200 a visit."
paddy says he'll think about it. Six months later, he runs into the doctor, who asks why he never came back.
"For £200 a visit!?" says paddy. "my mate Mick cured me for free."
"Is that so! How?"
"He told me to cut legs off the feckin bed."..
blue44
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- Ashton-u-lyne,Manchester.
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blue44
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Jun 2009
- Messages
- 9,143
- Location
- Ashton-u-lyne,Manchester.
- Team supported
- St Marks West Gorton
blue44
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Jun 2009
- Messages
- 9,143
- Location
- Ashton-u-lyne,Manchester.
- Team supported
- St Marks West Gorton
East Level 2
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What has eight arms and tells the time?
A clocktopus.
The other cracker jokes were even worse.
A clocktopus.
The other cracker jokes were even worse.
Tuearts right boot
Well-Known Member
The worrying question is...why are you pulling crackers so early.