Ho Chi Man City
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 27 Jan 2026
- Messages
- 596
I regularly take my dog on the London Underground, one day a fellow passenger gave him a crash course in how to play the trombone, he went from Barking to Tooting in half an hour.
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Zubrman
Well-Known Member
On the escalators in Lisbon it reads 'Always hold children's hands'
Anyone know a good lawyer?
Alan Harper's Tash
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 12 Dec 2010
- Messages
- 75,500
Bill Walker
Well-Known Member
My wife asked me to stop at the grocery and pick up a litre of milk. And if they had avocados, to get six.
I got home, told her they had avocados, and put six litres of milk on the counter
I got home, told her they had avocados, and put six litres of milk on the counter
chris63
Well-Known Member
Zuriblue
Well-Known Member
Maintainin
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 10 Sep 2009
- Messages
- 9,990
bladdered
Well-Known Member
Maintainin
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 10 Sep 2009
- Messages
- 9,990
Maintainin
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 10 Sep 2009
- Messages
- 9,990
After the wedding ceremony, the newlyweds headed straight to their hotel to enjoy the first night of their honeymoon.
They popped a bottle of champagne and started getting undressed. When the groom peeled off his socks, his bride stared at his feet in horror.
“Yikes! What happened to your feet?” she asked. “Your toes look bumpy. Why are they so messed up?”
“I had tolio when I was a kid,” he replied calmly.
“Don’t you mean polio?” she asked.
“No, tolio,” he said. “It only affected my toes.”
That seemed to satisfy her, and they carried on.
A moment later, he slipped off his trousers. Once again, she grimaced.
“Now what’s wrong with your knees?” she demanded. “They’re all knobbly and deformed!”
“I had kneasles as a child too,” he explained.
“You mean measles?” she asked.
“No—kneasles. Same sort of thing, but it only hit my knees.”
The bride sighed, accepted the explanation, and watched as he finally removed his underwear.
“Don’t tell me,” she said. “Let me guess…. Smallcox?”
They popped a bottle of champagne and started getting undressed. When the groom peeled off his socks, his bride stared at his feet in horror.
“Yikes! What happened to your feet?” she asked. “Your toes look bumpy. Why are they so messed up?”
“I had tolio when I was a kid,” he replied calmly.
“Don’t you mean polio?” she asked.
“No, tolio,” he said. “It only affected my toes.”
That seemed to satisfy her, and they carried on.
A moment later, he slipped off his trousers. Once again, she grimaced.
“Now what’s wrong with your knees?” she demanded. “They’re all knobbly and deformed!”
“I had kneasles as a child too,” he explained.
“You mean measles?” she asked.
“No—kneasles. Same sort of thing, but it only hit my knees.”
The bride sighed, accepted the explanation, and watched as he finally removed his underwear.
“Don’t tell me,” she said. “Let me guess…. Smallcox?”
Zubrman
Well-Known Member
Attachments
East Level 2
Well-Known Member
First time I heard that the illnesses were toesalitis, kneemonia and dicktheria.
Zubrman
Well-Known Member
Dicktheria and Tittyness?
