Joke thread

[Lavinda Past]

Our local Sainsbury's has a special Polish section.

When I got there the shelves were full of jars of pickles and packets of dried meat and stuff, all covered with foreign writing.

All I wanted was a can of Mr Sheen.

 

[Lavinda Past]

I've just bought a motorcycle which used to belong to Errol Brown from Hot Chocolate.


It started with a kick.

 

[Lavinda Past]

I took my new clarinet back to the music shop,

"I don't know what it is, " I said, "I can only seem to be able to play the song Perfect Day on it properly. Nothing else seems be right or in tune. "

"Let's have a look, " said the assistant as he dismantled my clarinet,

"Ha, there's the problem" he said, "it looks like it was fitted with a Lou Reed."