Joke thread

[chris63]

 

[Alex the Blue]

I once got a job on a plum farm, and the owner was actually called Mr. Plum :) although it was spelt with 2 M's

it was MMr Plum

Can't you read this is the joke thread

Well I laughed so somebody got it right.

 

[TangerineSteve17]

I said to my friend "Can you recommend some music for a children's party?
he said "Small Faces?"
I said "Course they have, they're kids."

 

[Tanzeylee]

These so called speed bumps are a joke, if anything they slow you down...

 

[Tanzeylee]

I quite fancy having some rabbit for my tea tonight, can anyone tell me if it's cheaper from the butchers or the pet shop?...

 

[Cellarite]

I quite fancy having some rabbit for my tea tonight, can anyone tell me if it's cheaper from the butchers or the pet shop?...

Probably cheaper from the butcher's. You'll be able to buy the exact amount that you want and will have the added bonus of not needing to kill, skin, gut and bone the fucker.

 

[the god Gerry Gow]

I quite fancy having some rabbit for my tea tonight, can anyone tell me if it's cheaper from the butchers or the pet shop?...

Ann Summers

 

[Squelch]

Our local school has become an academy, sponsored by IKEA.
Standards may be fine, but assembly takes ages.

 

[TangerineSteve17]

I said to my mum "Right i'm setting off to go to the fair now"
She said "Ooooh, are you gonna go on the ghost train?"
I said "No, I'll just walk down"

 

[TangerineSteve17]

My aggressive mate works for a mail order puppet company....He can't half pack a punch