Joke thread

BillyBonds said:
jimharri said:
Liverpool fans in distress can call a new helpline
0845 30313233

To be told by a recorded message - "You are currently 1st in the queue, but expect to be 2nd or 3rd if you call back at the weekend"

Class. Brilliant punch line.
 
Blue Mist said:
BillyBonds said:
jimharri said:
Liverpool fans in distress can call a new helpline
0845 30313233

To be told by a recorded message - "You are currently 1st in the queue, but expect to be 2nd or 3rd if you call back at the weekend"

Class. Brilliant punch line.

Thanks. Just trying to make people laugh now in case it all goes tits up on Sunday.
 
BillyBonds said:
Blue Mist said:
BillyBonds said:
To be told by a recorded message - "You are currently 1st in the queue, but expect to be 2nd or 3rd if you call back at the weekend"

Class. Brilliant punch line.

Thanks. Just trying to make people laugh now in case it all goes tits up on Sunday.
Going by your username, I hope you know the right thing for BFS's lads to do come sunday afternoon. We don't want them getting ideas above their station now!

;-)
 
jimharri said:
BillyBonds said:
Blue Mist said:
Class. Brilliant punch line.

Thanks. Just trying to make people laugh now in case it all goes tits up on Sunday.
Going by your username, I hope you know the right thing for BFS's lads to do come sunday afternoon. We don't want them getting ideas above their station now!

;-)

Well, no true fan would want to see their team lose but, if we lose to you and you win the title, fine. 94/95 season was deep, deep joy though :))
 
a business man goes out to Japan to broker a deal.
first night his host sends over a Geisha girl for his pleasure.
the make love all night and she spurs him on with cries of Onishi!! Onishi!!
he cums and collapses on the bed and sleeps the good sleep.
Next day, after the meeting they go and play golf.
on the 5th, his host drives off and gets a hole in one.
everyone claps, and the business man remembers the Geisha girl
Onishi!! he tells him

The host asks,What do you mean , wrong hole?
 
They have moved the Micheal Jackson statue from outside craven cottagers into the football museum in town.Is anyone going to take the kids down to see it?
 
14+-+1
 
Beswick Prize Bands Big Drum said:
TangerineSteve17 said:
I once got a job on a plum farm, and the owner was actually called Mr. Plum :) although it was spelt with 2 M's

it was MMr Plum
Can't you read this is the joke thread

Well I laughed so somebody got it right.
 
I quite fancy having some rabbit for my tea tonight, can anyone tell me if it's cheaper from the butchers or the pet shop?...
 
Tanzeylee said:
I quite fancy having some rabbit for my tea tonight, can anyone tell me if it's cheaper from the butchers or the pet shop?...

Probably cheaper from the butcher's. You'll be able to buy the exact amount that you want and will have the added bonus of not needing to kill, skin, gut and bone the fucker.
 

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