Joke thread

[DrBlueBob]

Thats really sad.
Will you be going, did you know him at all?

It wasn't the cough that finished him off, it was the coffin they carried him off in.

 

[jimharri]

Remember when you used to be able to get air for your tyres at your local petrol station for free? You have to pay for it now. Bloody inflation.

 

[Alan Harper's Tash]

We‘ve nicknamed our grandad Spiderman.

He doesn’t have any special powers; he just can’t get out of the bath.

 

[Blue Mist]

We‘ve nicknamed our grandad Spiderman.

He doesn’t have any special powers; he just can’t get out of the bath.

There was a similar one but can't remember it, it involved throwing the washing in as he was trying to get out

 

[blue44]

 

[Fred_Quimby]

If you rotate your phone the number of donkeys will increase

 

[JRockBlues]

Last night I dreamed I was eating a curry. When I woke up my pilau was gone.

 

[Beswick Prize Band]

Little old lady having consultation with Doctor. Doctor says,"Yes that was very loud ,but said ,can I hear your heart"

 

[Bill Walker]

I buy all my furniture and bathroom fittings from a local Chinese restaurant.

Last night I ordered a Suite and Shower

 

[Indaparkside]

Knew a guy who kept loads of farm vehicles for a hobby he sold them and moved on to collecting air conditioning units, I suppose you can call in an EXtractor fan