Joke thread

[Bill Walker]

My favourite lockdown Meme..

 

[Tuearts right boot]

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So that would be a 2 stroke then.

 

[blue44]

I have been admitted into hospital and they are keeping me in. I have only gone and bloody poisoned myself, thanks to my cooking skills. What I thought was an onion for my salad turned out to be a daffodil bulb. They said I should be out early spring.

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[Mid Wales blue]

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Well that’s just made me blow my horn!

 

[Citizen of Legoland]

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All the computer nerds thinking “We started one called 1023 Megabytes and neither have we”.

;)

 

[balotellishaircut]

Me; What’s the Wi-Fi password ?

Barman; You need to buy a drink first.

Me; Okay. I’ll have a coke.

Barman; Is Pepsi okay ?

Me; Sure, how much is that ?

Barman; £3

Me; There you go. So what’s the Wi-Fi password ?

Barman; You need to buy a drink first. No spaces, all lowercase.

 

[bluethrunthru]

 

[Sam Armstrong]

 

[Grassland Blue]

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Mamma mia!

 

[MCFCTrick]

 

[Grassland Blue]

Now THAT is funny!
Hahaha.

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Me; What’s the Wi-Fi password ?

Barman; You need to buy a drink first.

Me; Okay. I’ll have a coke.

Barman; Is Pepsi okay ?

Me; Sure, how much is that ?

Barman; £3

Me; There you go. So what’s the Wi-Fi password ?

Barman; You need to buy a drink first. No spaces, all lowercase.

I got there in the end.

 

[Protein Junkie]

True Story.
On a train with Mrs PJ last night and the tannoy system said “ if you see something that’s looks not right please show it to the Guard”
So I showed him my wife.

 

[Nellies left peg]

True Story.
On a train with Mrs PJ last night and the tannoy system said “ if you see something that’s looks not right please show it to the Guard”
So I showed him my wife.

I bet your tea is not on the table when you get home tonight:-)

 

[Mr Fraser]

So that would be a 2 stroke then.

Think more than 2 strokes would be required

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]