Joke thread

Alan Harper's Tash said:
Not even if it’s one of those fancy Vileda ones!
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No you chump! Apparently buying something you need isn’t a gift, even when you get told it’s something they’d like. I’m on 30 years of marriage and still not sure of the rules.

My wife’s birthday next week and I’ve bought a Ring doorbell (among other more frivolous items), as she’s been banging on about her mate has one and it’s soooo useful. We can’t afford it, so I’m expecting a good shoeing for bothering to listen to her and getting something she wants. I wonder if she thinks I like the abuse, and maybe that’s her way of thanking me? Mind you, at our age any physical contact is a bonus!

I suspect Stockholm syndrome…
 
Uwe Already said:
No you chump! Apparently buying something you need isn’t a gift, even when you get told it’s something they’d like. I’m on 30 years of marriage and still not sure of the rules.

My wife’s birthday next week and I’ve bought a Ring doorbell (among other more frivolous items), as she’s been banging on about her mate has one and it’s soooo useful. We can’t afford it, so I’m expecting a good shoeing for bothering to listen to her and getting something she wants. I wonder if she thinks I like the abuse, and maybe that’s her way of thanking me? Mind you, at our age any physical contact is a bonus!

I suspect Stockholm syndrome…
Click to expand...
Sounds like your wife could use a self help book on being grateful.

You've still got time if you’ve got Amazon Prime.
 
Uwe Already said:
No you chump! Apparently buying something you need isn’t a gift, even when you get told it’s something they’d like. I’m on 30 years of marriage and still not sure of the rules.

My wife’s birthday next week and I’ve bought a Ring doorbell (among other more frivolous items), as she’s been banging on about her mate has one and it’s soooo useful. We can’t afford it, so I’m expecting a good shoeing for bothering to listen to her and getting something she wants. I wonder if she thinks I like the abuse, and maybe that’s her way of thanking me? Mind you, at our age any physical contact is a bonus!

I suspect Stockholm syndrome…
Click to expand...
I bought my missus a new bag and matching belt. Hoover works perfectly now.
 
Uwe Already said:
No you chump! Apparently buying something you need isn’t a gift, even when you get told it’s something they’d like. I’m on 30 years of marriage and still not sure of the rules.

My wife’s birthday next week and I’ve bought a Ring doorbell (among other more frivolous items), as she’s been banging on about her mate has one and it’s soooo useful. We can’t afford it, so I’m expecting a good shoeing for bothering to listen to her and getting something she wants. I wonder if she thinks I like the abuse, and maybe that’s her way of thanking me? Mind you, at our age any physical contact is a bonus!

I suspect Stockholm syndrome…
Click to expand...
Play safe and get flowers as well.
 
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Everytime i make love to my wife i keep bursting out a song baby baby baby
The wife said why do u keep singing
I replied when I put the tip in I think I'm a famous pop star
She said oh right which one? i replied
JUST-IN BEAVER
 
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