Joke thread

[Fred_Quimby]

 

[Lavinda Past]

.

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[kippaxneil]

Local News: A suspect was charged with killing a man with sandpaper.
In defence, the suspect said, 'I only intended to rough him up a bit.'

 

[Lavinda Past]

Local News: A suspect was charged with killing a man with sandpaper.
In defence, the suspect said, 'I only intended to rough him up a bit.'

Reminded me of that old comedian who used to use sandpaper for wanking....

Dick Emery

 

[Nellies left peg]

Reminded me of that old comedian who used to use sandpaper for wanking....

Dick Emery

What a BALL ache , not very WISE and not WORTH the pain

 

[PPT]

Local News: A suspect was charged with killing a man with sandpaper.
In defence, the suspect said, 'I only intended to rough him up a bit.'

He must have rubbed him up the wrong way for him to do that.

 

[roman totale]

Local News: A suspect was charged with killing a man with sandpaper.
In defence, the suspect said, 'I only intended to rough him up a bit.'

Gritty.

 

[Xhavenjoe]

Reminded me of that old comedian who used to use sandpaper for wanking....

Dick Emery

Or this one.

Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters when they were having sex.
Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help. Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.
A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?"
Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"

 

[KS55]

What do you call a drunken Muslim?







Mohammered

 

[cinnamon]

When I was eight years old, I had a Meccano kit. The kid next door had two. He was Up-a-meccano.

 

[JASR]

When I was eight years old, I had a Meccano kit. The kid next door had two. He was Up-a-meccano.

Where are the mod’s on Friday night? Partying in the Caribbean on Ric’s 2nd yacht no doubt, whilst they should be in here, handing out immediate thread bans for … ‘jokes’ like that!

 

[Lavinda Past]

When I was eight years old, I had a Meccano kit. The kid next door had two. He was Up-a-meccano.

When I was eight years old, I had fuck all. The bloke next door was a paedo. He was Up-a-mearsehole.

That's how to tell a shit joke.

 

[goalmole]

Where are the mod’s on Friday night? Partying in the Caribbean on Ric’s 2nd yacht no doubt, whilst they should be in here, handing out immediate thread bans for … ‘jokes’ like that!

That was a joke?
You must be joking.

 

[Petethemancinleeds]

When I was eight years old, I had a Meccano kit. The kid next door had two. He was Up-a-meccano.

VAR verdict...........................NO Joke.

 

[Tuearts right boot]

When I was eight years old, I had a Meccano kit. The kid next door had two. He was Up-a-meccano.

Is it just me ???

 

[dickie davies]

Is it just me ???

The bike is outside

 

[KS55]

One for the FOCs.
What do you call a crap pop band?






The Small Faeces.

 

[blue b4 the moon]

Is it just me ???

No idea either....is there an Italian reference in it?