blue44
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 20 Jun 2009
- Messages
- 9,144
- Location
- Ashton-u-lyne,Manchester.
- Team supported
- St Marks West Gorton
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
Fiftyyearsandcounting
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 25 Oct 2009
- Messages
- 2,119
Supermarket tannoy announcement -
"A dropped £20 note has been handed in, would the owner please form a queue at the customer services".
jimharri
Moderator
Around here, it wouldn't hit the floor!
JRockBlues
Well-Known Member
A priest, a rabbit, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbit, "What will you have?" The rabbit shakes his head and answers, "I have no idea. I'm only here because of Autocorrect."
sir baconface
Well-Known Member
Zuriblue
Well-Known Member
Snow White, Shrek and Pinocchio are out for a stroll at the Land of Make-Believe World Fair. They are strolling along and come across a big tent that advertises 'The World Beauty Contest'. Snow White turns to the others and says,
''I'm gonna enter. No-one is more beautiful than me.''
Pinocchio and Shrek wait outside laying in the sun and 30 minutes later a beaming Snow White skips out with a crown and a big cup saying 'The worlds most beautiful'
The three friends continue their walk. Presently they come to another marquee that is holding 'The Worlds Strongest Man' competition. Shrek turns to the others and says,
''I got this''
Thirty minutes later Shrek comes out singing ''Champion, champion'' The three friends continue their walk. They come across another large canvas structure that is holding ' The Worlds Biggest Liar' contest. Pinocchio turns to the other two and says,
''This ones mine.''
Thirty minutes later he emerges, with tears in his eyes and barks,
''Who the feck is Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson?
''I'm gonna enter. No-one is more beautiful than me.''
Pinocchio and Shrek wait outside laying in the sun and 30 minutes later a beaming Snow White skips out with a crown and a big cup saying 'The worlds most beautiful'
The three friends continue their walk. Presently they come to another marquee that is holding 'The Worlds Strongest Man' competition. Shrek turns to the others and says,
''I got this''
Thirty minutes later Shrek comes out singing ''Champion, champion'' The three friends continue their walk. They come across another large canvas structure that is holding ' The Worlds Biggest Liar' contest. Pinocchio turns to the other two and says,
''This ones mine.''
Thirty minutes later he emerges, with tears in his eyes and barks,
''Who the feck is Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson?
dronefromsector7G
Well-Known Member
I decided to trace my pet frogs ancestry... Turns out he's part Irish, part British, and a tad Pole!
Bill Walker
Well-Known Member
I was out with my partner yesterday at the local supermarket.
We were deciding whether to buy some beef, lamb, pork, or venison for Sunday lunch.
In the end...
It was a joint decision.
We were deciding whether to buy some beef, lamb, pork, or venison for Sunday lunch.
In the end...
It was a joint decision.
Oooooooooooooooooh that's bad
Stuuuuuu
Well-Known Member
OK but why a picture of the hockey team?