Joke thread

[ali benarbia's studs]

Jesus 2. The Return of the Beard

Spear me the shite jokes

 

[dickie davies]

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Has someone stolen the bike from its holder?

 

[Sheriff Fatman]

Spear me the shite jokes

Don't get cross.

 

[Uncle Wally One Ball]

I just see James May when he's yelling "Clarkson!"

Pair of cunts

 

[Plays By Sense Of Smell]

Spear me the shite jokes

Quite a rib tickler, if you ask me...

 

[blue44]

 

[blue44]

 

[Bill Walker]

I had a fun childhood. My dad used to push me down the hill in old tires.
They were the Goodyears.

 

[Grassland Blue]

Spear me the shite jokes

You won't get a laurel laughs with that......

 

[The perfect fumble]

 

[dronefromsector7G]

​

I got kicked out of a karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone six times in a row.

They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts…

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Serious, today.....a mate comes in work for a chat. He's got about 10 acres of land with an old deserted gold mine on it. He cleared the land and bought an all singing all dancing metal detector to have a prospect. He gets all kinds of readings, beeps and buzzes but only finds an old nail. After a while he gave up. It was only as he was putting it away that he realised the noises and contacts he was making with the detector all came from the fact he had steel toe caps in his boots.

 

[mrcunny]

 

[Blue Llama]

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??

 

[Tuearts right boot]

View attachment 103652

It's carrotist and I for one am extremely offended, who do I complain to ?

 

[KS55]

It's carrotist and I for one am extremely offended, who do I complain to ?

The local parsnip.

 

[mrcunny]

It's carrotist and I for one am extremely offended, who do I complain to

The local parsnip.

We don't have one of those atm.

 

[Zubrman]

It's carrotist and I for one am extremely offended, who do I complain to ?

The Swedish Consulate.

 

[Blue Mist]

View attachment 103652

Turnip in

 

[BimboBob]

I'm getting into classical music...