jimharri
Moderator
Post it in the Labour and Starmer threads. Go on; I dare you!
It did make me titter, to be fair.
Joke thread
- Thread starter mrcunny
- Start date
It did make me titter, to be fair.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I was so drunk last night.
I got to the bottom of the stairs. I took off my shoes, coat, top, trousers, and underwear and left them on the floor
I crept up the stairs very quietly....
It was only when I got to the top of the stairs, I realised I was on the bus.
I got to the bottom of the stairs. I took off my shoes, coat, top, trousers, and underwear and left them on the floor
I crept up the stairs very quietly....
It was only when I got to the top of the stairs, I realised I was on the bus.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I woke up this morning with a one pound coin stuck up my arse.
I must have been completely trollied last night.
I must have been completely trollied last night.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
I read that drinking two glasses of whiskey increases your chance of having a stroke.
I'm going to drink four or five glasses tonight... It might increase my chance of getting a blow job.
I'm going to drink four or five glasses tonight... It might increase my chance of getting a blow job.
LWashington
Well-Known Member
There may be some more coins up there, you need to get to a scanner and check it out.
Mid Wales blue
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- 30 Jan 2017
- Messages
- 4,782
No, but I’m pretty sure someone has felt the gravity of the situation!
NZBlue
Well-Known Member
And, for a change, he's not even Russian.
Lavinda Past
Well-Known Member
A bloke is walking down the street aa a funeral courtage goes past. He notices that it’s rather different from the usual procession.
There’s a horse-drawn hearse, followed by a second hearse, followed by a man with a dog on a lead, and behind them several dozen men, alll in single file.
He turns to another man who’s come out of the pub to watch and says “That’s rather unusual”.
The man says “That’s Mary Murphy’s funeral”.
“What happened?”
“She was yelling at her husband something fierce and his dog up and killed her.”
“How awful. Whose is the second coffin?”
“That’s her mother”.
What happened to her?”
She tried to intervene so the dog killed her as well”.
The man thinks for a few seconds and says “Do you think there’s any chance I could borrow the dog?”
“You’ll have to get in the line with the rest of them fellas following the cars”.
There’s a horse-drawn hearse, followed by a second hearse, followed by a man with a dog on a lead, and behind them several dozen men, alll in single file.
He turns to another man who’s come out of the pub to watch and says “That’s rather unusual”.
The man says “That’s Mary Murphy’s funeral”.
“What happened?”
“She was yelling at her husband something fierce and his dog up and killed her.”
“How awful. Whose is the second coffin?”
“That’s her mother”.
What happened to her?”
She tried to intervene so the dog killed her as well”.
The man thinks for a few seconds and says “Do you think there’s any chance I could borrow the dog?”
“You’ll have to get in the line with the rest of them fellas following the cars”.