Joke thread

[Bill Walker]

I had a dog that would bring me a bottle of wine when I asked it to....

it was a Bordeaux collie.

 

[Sam101]

 

[johnny crossan]

“What’s the best thing about living in Switzerland?”, the country’s embassy in the United Kingdom was asked.
“Well, the flag is a big plus.”

 

[johnny crossan]

View attachment 166182

49 wasn't it

 

[sir baconface]

 

[NZBlue]

49 wasn't it

He doesn't want to talk about it

 

[SCEtoAUX]

Patrick Stewart is a brilliant actor, having played countless roles over the years, including some superb Shakesperian theatre. History however will remember him as Captain of the Starship Enterprise. One could say he has been hoisted by his own Picard.

 

[chris63]

Dr Dr. I think I'm invisible.

Who said that.

 

[RadcliffeRick]

Dr Dr, I think I am a pair of curtains.
Doctor:- pull yourself together!!

 

[Uwe Already]

Dr Dr, I think I'm turning into a moth

And why have you come to see me?

You left your light on...

 

[SCEtoAUX]

Dr Dr, I think I'm turning into a moth

And why have you come to see me?

You left your light on...

Norm did this one so well:

 

[Tuearts right boot]

Absolutely brilliant, the guy was and will always be a comedy genius.

 

[Uwe Already]

Norm did this one so well:

Mines snappier ;) TBH I had a trigger from the Dr jokes and the Les Dawson clip, not sure he ever told it

 

[Sam101]

I went to my girlfriend's funeral today.



It was the first time I'd met her parents.



What a pair of miserable bastards.

 

[Sam101]

 

[BackofJeanette]

 

[TinFoilHat]

 

[chris63]

Dr Dr I think I'm a snooker ball

Get to the end of the queue/cue

 

[chris63]

 

[Vienna_70]

Cars have too many gadgets these days.

I tried to reverse, and it played a video of someone being run over by a car,