Joke thread

[Tuearts right boot]

This morning the wife left me...
So I went out and bought a St Bernard dog and a Harley Davidson
and spent over a grand on drink, drugs and a prossie...
She'll fucking kill me when she gets in from work.

 

[lawton mellor]

Back stabbers by Ben Dover

Life as a hooker by V D Rotsyercockoff.

 

[lefty goldblatt]

 

[sir baconface]

 

[bladdered]

 

[kippaxneil]

Dominatrixes certainly are some rude people. You’d think for that price they could afford a little kindness.

 

[bladdered]

 

[bluethrunthru]

This is weird but funny - Crowther was only in his mid 50's at this stage and presumably was keen to "maintain relevance" in a rapidly changing comedy landscape - I think the voice over is Ade Edmondson

 

[bluethrunthru]

 

[bluethrunthru]

New Warburton's ad drops

 

[noseve]

This is weird but funny - Crowther was only in his mid 50's at this stage and presumably was keen to "maintain relevance" in a rapidly changing comedy landscape - I think the voice over is Ade Edmondson

2 jokes in one - close your eyes and that could be Farage talking...

 

[sir baconface]

 

[kippaxneil]

Just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands whilst in the Trafford Centre.
Well, I say 'bought'...I actually stole it off a short, fat, ginger kid.

 

[noblelord]

Just bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands whilst in the Trafford Centre.
Well, I say 'bought'...I actually stole it off a short, fat, ginger kid.

This was last posted on Sunday

 

[Uwe Already]

Winnie the Pooh went to the West Indies

Antigua?

No, with Piglet…

 

[mexico1970]

 

[KS55]

Well, the evidence, 2 days on, suggests that there is never a time for it?

:-)

The Dave Ewing Story by O.G. KING.

 

[noseve]

The Dave Ewing Story by O.G. KING.

Just before my time - I had to look him up. 12 own goals is pretty impressive...

 

[Sam101]

Just joined a Ukranian dating site.





I've now got a chick in Kiev

 

[KS55]

Just joined a Ukranian dating site.





I've now got a chick in Kiev

Does she ooze garlic butter?