Love At First Sight?

jimharri said:
Still no pictures. One of the mods needs to have "a quiet word" with the OP.
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Courtesy of IBH,

She's a keeper all right.

Ugly-Girl.jpg
 
I'm delighted for @IanBishopsHaircut that this is going well.
For what it's worth, I don't believe in love at first sight. It's a lovely idea but too idealistic for me.
I believe in lust at first sight and I think that you can tell quite quickly whether someone is worth a continued investment of time and effort but, until you take the time to get to know someone properly you can't possibly fall in love with them.
 
bluegirl74 said:
I'm delighted for @IanBishopsHaircut that this is going well.
For what it's worth, I don't believe in love at first sight. It's a lovely idea but too idealistic for me.
I believe in lust at first sight and I think that you can tell quite quickly whether someone is worth a continued investment of time and effort but, until you take the time to get to know someone properly you can't possibly fall in love with them.
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It exists..trust me..I'm living it

I've been in lust many times with many beautiful women that have turned my head for a plethora of reasons

This is nothing like any of them

I adore this woman..and just as ridiculous she feels the same

This will only end one way..and it won't be heartbreak..I intend to be with her until I draw my last
 
IanBishopsHaircut said:
It exists..trust me..I'm living it

I've been in lust many times with many beautiful women that have turned my head for a plethora of reasons

This is nothing like any of them

I adore this woman..and just as ridiculous she feels the same

This will only end one way..and it won't be heartbreak..I intend to be with her until I draw my last
Click to expand...

Interesting reading

Love at First Sight

Evolutionary psychologists have found evidence that ovulation heightens women's response to the pheromone androstenol—a contributor to male body odor—and to the sight of strong male facial features, ones that emphasize secondary sex characteristics, such as an angled chin or a large forehead. But the increased appeal of attributes conveying a sense of strength, aggression or dominance is only one part of the finely tuned mate-identification system.

C. Neil Macrae, a professor of psychological and brain sciences at Dartmouth College, and his colleagues theorized that women's heightened awareness of male features during certain phases of their menstrual cycle might be further demonstrated by subtle tests related to person perception—for instance, asking women to assign a gender to a face in a photograph or to a stereotypical term such as bald, doll or skirt.

Macrae's study, published in the November 2002 issue of Psychological Science, tested women during two different phases of their menstrual cycle: when the risk of conception was high (the day of ovulation and the two preceding days) and when the risk was low (the first three days of the cycle). Subjects were first asked to identify the gender of 100 randomly displayed faces in photographs (50 men and 50 women). In a subsequent test, women were asked to categorize the gender associated with 64 stereotypical terms. A randomly selected photograph of a man, a woman or a random pattern preceded each term as a priming stimulus. Participants were told to ignore the initial image (flashing on the screen for a fraction of a second and followed by a brief lull before the apearance of each term), but some women seemed extremely attuned to certain characteristics in the photographs.

The subjects' mean response times were fastest—both when identifying male faces and when categorizing typically masculine terms preceded by a male face—during the menstrual phase in which the women were at the highest risk of conception. Macrae and his colleagues conclude that proximity to ovulation may be one of many factors influencing the efficiency and access of social stereotypes.

Why use stereotypes to study sexual receptivity? Social stereotyping, Macrae says, "is basically a reservoir of knowledge and memory to access quickly ... and apply to situations when you don't have to think about them." Easy access to the mental shorthand of male characteristics might be particularly helpful when selecting a mate.

Previous research, Macrae says, shows that women also have an increased preference for "facial configurations that convey dominance" and other stereotypical male attributes. Women prefer more masculine faces during ovulation and more feminine faces at other points of the menstrual cycle. Men's notions of attractiveness (such as ideal hip-to-waist ratio), on the other hand, remain relatively constant over time.

Some factors that may influence access to social stereotypes seem to transcend gender. The mental shorthand involved in both genders' mate choices has been found to include a preference for symmetrical faces, an attribute that most people associate with such desirable traits as a strong immune system and general evolutionary fitness.

And in a study described in the September issue of Psychological Science, Macrae and his colleagues manipulated the eye gaze of faces in randomly displayed photographs. Among full-face and three-quarter-face images in which the eyes were looking straight ahead, averted or closed, both male and female subjects categorized the gender fastest when the photographed faces peered directly at them from the screen. A subsequent test, constituting the second part of the experiment, used the photographs as a priming stimulus for subjects distinguishing nonwords from stereotypical terms. In this situation the gaze direction in the photographs did not generally enhance test performance. (And in a study to be published in the March 2003 issue of the European journal Developmental Science—co-authored by Macrae and Bruce M. Hood of the University of Bristol—investigators report that children and adults more easily recognized and recalled faces with a direct gaze than an averted gaze.)

To identify important social interactions in daily life, Macrae says, "evolution forces you to tune the efficiency of the [perceptual] system." Awareness of this system can also provide keys to the impression we make on those around us: Your face may not be symmetrical, your timing not impeccable, but a direct look seems to send a strong signal to the opposite sex. Whether you actually impress someone when you open your mouth, however, is another matter entirely.—Frank Diller
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EDIT: The point is that whilst research in the area is extremely thin on the ground, it's thought that if the evolutionary markers are extremely closely matched enough between two people and they meet at the correct time in the menstrual cycle then it is theoretically possible that the attraction will last indefinitely.

With that said, generally anthropologists seem to believe that love is more socially invented than it is biological.
 
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If I was so inclined I could make love to the dancer in the picture.
I am unsure however as to the possibilities of falling in love with her.
 
IanBishopsHaircut said:
It exists..trust me..I'm living it

I've been in lust many times with many beautiful women that have turned my head for a plethora of reasons

This is nothing like any of them

I adore this woman..and just as ridiculous she feels the same

This will only end one way..and it won't be heartbreak..I intend to be with her until I draw my last
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We've all been there. Most people who get married would feel this way too, but what happens to a lot of marriages...divorce.
Ive had 2 relationships where ive felt how you've felt, you know what happened? One shagged my mate and the other went mental and tried to kill me.

Good luck!
 
Damocles said:
Interesting reading



EDIT: The point is that whilst research in the area is extremely thin on the ground, it's thought that if the evolutionary markers are extremely closely matched enough between two people and they meet at the correct time in the menstrual cycle then it is theoretically possible that the attraction will last indefinitely.

With that said, generally anthropologists seem to believe that love is more socially invented than it is biological.
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Interesting read

I attribute it more to the fact we met on a Bluemoon (31/07/2015) ;-)
 
I thought you were going to say met on a BlueMoon piss up then! Lordy I am missing out if that's what happens on these dos
 
Post of the year.
Magicpants said:
In six months you will be miserable as fuck, crying into your pillow while she is out being dry bummed by some little twat in cut off jeans, canvas slip-ons and an Olly Murs hair do, otherwise known as "out with the girls".

In twelve months you will be staring longingly at the ceiling beam, wondering if it could bear your weight because she has just fucked you off for a totally different little twat in cut off jeans, canvas slip-ons and an Olly Murs hair do.

In 18 months you will be a social pariah, sat alone in your living room wanking to a picture of her using your tears as lube, because all the friends you didn't bother with while you were "in love" are sick and tired of you bringing them down by sniveling about how much you love her.

In 2 years you will genuinely wonder what you ever saw in the chunky, vacuous woman and will have nothing but regret for the 2 years of your life you pissed away while you deluded yourself.

A wise man once said "Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment".
Save yourself the misery, stay single, all relationships are doomed, people only stay together for 3 reasons, fear of being alone, lack of options or habit.
The world is a clopper buffet, dig in.
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But I hope it goes well for you blue, all the best!!
 
whats the background mate?

im certainly not trying to piss on your chips but have you considered if theres an ulterior motive?

please dont think Im a spoiler but just consider your circumstances and hers

I hope Im being over cautious and yes I do believe in love at first sight

If my suggestion of caution is wrong ( I hope it is) then have at it....youre one of the lucky ones and good luck to you both
 
Just a quick update..I'm still completely and utterly in love..even more so now I'm starting to get to really know her..have met her family and friends whom I get on well with..have had some amazing nights out and in..just don't know what to say other than she's the one

She's changed my whole outlook on life..from an old cynic into a true believer that there genuinely is somebody out there for everyone if you're lucky enough to find them

I couldn't be happier..will update again in a few months..will propose to her within the year ;-)
 
IanBishopsHaircut said:
Just a quick update..I'm still completely and utterly in love..even more so now I'm starting to get to really know her..have met her family and friends whom I get on well with..have had some amazing nights out and in..just don't know what to say other than she's the one

She's changed my whole outlook on life..from an old cynic into a true believer that there genuinely is somebody out there for everyone if you're lucky enough to find them

I couldn't be happier..will update again in a few months..will propose to her within the year ;-)
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Welling up here!

That's great news, long may it continue.

Also a big shout out to @Ronnie the Rep and his Mrs, missed his post first time round.
 
The horrible bastard that ended up waking up in my house on Sunday morning was probably in love once too, and she says her husband is still wholly in love with her now. She finds it boring, so she told me. The really horrible thing is, in the daylight when taking her back to her friends house where the poor bugger thought she was staying, it turns out they have recently bought a house about 200 yards away from my house. In the dead of night he could probably have heard her from my place. Her mates husband dropped them off in a small town nearby for an evening out for the rugby and then he was away to work for a few days. As soon as he pulled off through the traffic lights they both bolted across the street and jumped on a train to the city centre to go out on the tiles. 5 hours later she's getting Wally One Balled in my house. True love indeed.

Yesterday afternoon I go fir a pint for the Ireland game. A lady I know is up there with her best mate having a drink. She has been occasionally on the books for a couple of years. She finishes work at midday and should be here for 'coffee' by 1pm. Shes been married for 18yrs and will be home to make his tea after an afternoon astride me.

Went to Benidorm a few weeks ago and was on a roll for the first weekend. Met and became intimate friends with 3 lovely ladies from various parts of England who were certainly not shy. All married.

I have a friend who lives between my house and the local pub and while not married she has been living with her bloke for nearly 10 years. He works nights on weekends driving a taxi. We regularly end up in eachothers houses on weekends. No encouragement from me by the way, apparently he is quite a nice bloke.

Now Im no cynic, maybe a realist. Im absolutely sure that these people fell in love and got married with the best intentions, but I am convinced that I am walking talking proof that it is just an idealistic notion in the minds of romantics or persons who become blinded by it because they are predisposed to think that birds tweet then they are with someone they like. I often read threads on here and chat with people I know who are in the doldrums and despairing because their true love has gone and they cant see a way past the shit they find themselves in. If they had the starting point of the healthy dose of realism that I live by, they would not end up like that. Good luck to posters on here that are in love, sincerely, but keep your feet on the ground and your heads screwed firmly on.
 
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