Make your own United debacle headline story

[Dave Ewing's Back 'eader]

Ten Rag on FA charge for hurting Jadon's feelings.

 

[KingGeorge]

The first 10,000 fans to show up to the next match at Old Trafford will receive Norwich colored rags compliments of TeamViewer. Give your car a good buff with them.

 

[yeah whatever !!]

United shares hit an all time high on the laughing stock exchange.

 

[TinFoilHat]

MUTV are proud to presnt a new show hosted by Martin Edwards about the history of Ladies Toilets at Old Trafford.

Through The Peephole starts this Thursday at 22:30. Exclusive to MUTV.

 

[Protein Junkie]

International Break
Ryan Giggs suffers hamstring injury.

 

[Norbert D]

No need to make one up….

Man Utd top league of transfer losses with negative spend of more than £1bn in last decade

Manchester United have spent a record £1.19bn more on transfers over the past decade than they have recouped through player sales, according to a new study.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[Gorton_Tubster]

haha brilliant

 

[Gorton_Tubster]

Manchester United : The Theatre of Fiends.

 

[Asa Clubs]

VAR overrules Old Trafford leaky roof evidence. No refund for fans.

 

[birch villa]

Man utd spend more money than everyone else over the last ten years
"And are still fucking shit"

 

[bluethrunthru]

United still confident of signing Wesley Sneijder

​

 

[TinFoilHat]

Exclusive to Manchester United fans.

Do you want to meet women?

In An exclusive offer to the greatest fans in the world. Ryan Giggs, Clayton Blackmore, and Mason Greenwood offer to show you how to get the women of your dreams.

No means Yes is available for the introductory price of £99.99!

The first 100 owners of this exclusive dating system will also receive a bonus pack of how to make millions presented by another legend Mickey Thomas.

Hurry now whilst stocks last as they will only be available for a limited period.*



*Or anyone is arrested...

 

[KS55]

The rags have launched a new journalistic award which will go to the writer each year that produces the most sycophantic, egregious, nonsensical crap about the club and its players. Particular emphasis will be placed on the bulling up of the latest wonderboy who goes on to be sold to a non- league side.
The award will be called The Goebbels Shield.
In addition, the club is pleased to announce a lifetime award for the writer who produces the most pro rag propaganda in his career while posing as an actual journalist. It will be called The David Meek Cornucopia.

 

[Bluekiwi]

International Break
Ryan Giggs suffers hamstring injury.

Did you mean to write "groin strain" ?

 

[Debaser]

Exclusive this Sunday in the mirror;

Gary Neville is still a ****.

 

[bluetonium]

Manchester United have refuted claims they will run out to "Smack my b!tch up" at their next home game, insisting they have no knowledge of any of their players ever having hit a dog.

 

[David Kloppesh]

Manure launch new home kit

 

[Debaser]

Man United were "unaware" coach Geoff Konopka was a paedophile

 

[Fernster]

United in spectacular transfer deal:
United are set to break the world record to bring the best player on the planet to Old Trafford.
Everyone at United are flying high after hearing the news of this spectacular signing.
He will be the final piece of the jigsaw and United will win everything once he pulls that shirt on.
Ronaldo said he was bored in Saudi Arabia and is excited to play for the greatest club in world football!!!!

 

[jaiguruKun]

"BRITAIN'S BIGGEST CLUB EATS ITSELF"