Meeting Rag Players & ******* Them Off!

[kinkladze:-)]

Whilst sat at a set of lights at Barton, windows down enjoying some glorious Manchester sunshineeeeeeeeeeeee, a Ferrari pulled along side me, roof down, tunes banging out! My girlfriend looked across at the guy and said rather loudly....'look at that ugly bastard posing', prompted by her shout, i looked across and found i was looking eye to eye with a rather miffed Gary Neville! Lights changed, my foot hit the floor, outpasing his Italian Show-off mobile, i quickly cut him up whilst waving a two-fingered salute from my window!

My smile lasted all day, and when i told my Dad he gave me a look of upmost pride, the same look when we witnessed Neville gifting the goat!!

 

[bluemoon32]

I work as a youth worker
Last summer there was a sport project at 1 of the clubs
Sun Ji Park came 1 day for a photo shoot for nike on the field next 2 the project.

All the RAG kids were getting giddy, so one of the workers asked if he would come over 2 say hello and sign some autographs.
Guess what, he declined and fu**ed off in his motor sharpish.

The RAG kids were all crying, thats when I informed them that a City player would never do that : )


Still what a t**t though hey

Trevor fucking Francis did it to me the twaaaaaaaat, Joe Corrigan came over and called him an arsehole & then waited patiently whilst my Mother tried to work out how to use our camera lol

 

[ballinio]

a mate of mine was working at m/cr airport in the mid nineties on baggage handling. Rags flew back from Barcelona on a wednesday night after they had been well & truely leathered 4.0 i think. Any way there were some fans on the flight with them & one of them was disabled, my mate sees whats unloaded, grabs a wheelchair & marches it up to bobby charlton & denis law....`there you go lads, the other 10 will be out in a minute` he says................law pissed his sides laughing, bobbys head just wobbled, not quite as bad as now though.

 

[Miami Weiss]

Re: Meeting Rag Players & Pissing Them Off!

i stole denis irwins coat frrom a pub in dublin and threw it in the liffey,after going through his pockets

Haha, quality.
How much did you pocket? ;)

 

[BingoBango]

Re: Meeting Rag Players & Pissing Them Off!

Back when Tommy Doc was their manager I was working in Jimmy Saville's club when Lou Macari came in. I said "Oi, Lou, why aren't you serving in the chippy".

He wasn't happy.

Anyway, when he left his coat in the locker room I went over, told them I had been told to get it for him and take it to him and took it out the back.

The night before I had had toad in the hole for tea and had awful constipation. I dropped my pants and with al the might I could muster, desposited a log in his coat pocket.

When he came back a few hours later he was fuming, you should have seen his face. He started shouting 'Someone has had a shit in my coat pocket. I've been had over again by those damn City fans'.

Anyway, I wasn't there to witness this as the effort I had to muster to overcome the constipation was so much that I had ruptured my anal passage. I got a mate to take the coat back to the cloak room but I was writhing in agony on the floor and an ambulance had to be called. Two hours later I was having life saving surgery. Imagine my surprise when I woke up the following day and two coppers were waiting to arrest me. They had put two and two together and had me bang to rights for shitting in a coat.

I got five years, served three, lost my job and family and haven't seen any of my children in 30 years. Oh, and I have a plastic bag attached to my waist at all times now.

Still, got one over on that Rag Macari though, eh.

A bump for all those who missed it.

JMA - take a bow. Satire is alive.

 

[maineroad68]

Re: Meeting Rag Players & Pissing Them Off!

Back when Tommy Doc was their manager I was working in Jimmy Saville's club when Lou Macari came in. I said "Oi, Lou, why aren't you serving in the chippy".

He wasn't happy.

Anyway, when he left his coat in the locker room I went over, told them I had been told to get it for him and take it to him and took it out the back.

The night before I had had toad in the hole for tea and had awful constipation. I dropped my pants and with al the might I could muster, desposited a log in his coat pocket.

When he came back a few hours later he was fuming, you should have seen his face. He started shouting 'Someone has had a shit in my coat pocket. I've been had over again by those damn City fans'.

Anyway, I wasn't there to witness this as the effort I had to muster to overcome the constipation was so much that I had ruptured my anal passage. I got a mate to take the coat back to the cloak room but I was writhing in agony on the floor and an ambulance had to be called. Two hours later I was having life saving surgery. Imagine my surprise when I woke up the following day and two coppers were waiting to arrest me. They had put two and two together and had me bang to rights for shitting in a coat.

I got five years, served three, lost my job and family and haven't seen any of my children in 30 years. Oh, and I have a plastic bag attached to my waist at all times now.

Still, got one over on that Rag Macari though, eh.

A bump for all those who missed it.

JMA - take a bow. Satire is alive.

i love this classic thread. and this is one of the funniest posts i've ever read. if i remember rightly, the furore it caused, with some people outraged at JMA's tale was even funnier!!

 

[maineroad68]

Re: Meeting Rag Players & Pissing Them Off!

doh!! it's fucking genius, is what it is!!

sick is what it is, dont care who it is shitting in someones coat is just wrong.

found it. the outraged response that made me laugh even more than the actual story!!

 

[BufordUSABlue]

About 15 years ago, Me and a few mates (rags included) were in Cheerleaders bar next to GMex where we were going to a Gary Glitter Xmas Gang Show, (I know, I'm not proud). Anyway, in Cheerleaders who do we see? Giggs, Keane, Sharpe (also going to the gig).

My mate walks up to Keane, gets him in a headlock and startswalking round the pub with him, slapping the top of hid head saying " you might have been a tough guy in Nottingham, you're fuck all round here mate." Keane absolutely shat himself, as did his team mates.

I always reminded my rag mates of this story when they went on about their hero Keano. and they couldn't say it was bullshit 'cos they witnessed it.[/quot

Fecking Brilliant ! Only City fans could do this!!

 

[lawrenceofbernarbia]

My girlfriend's father who is a big blue takes great pride in the fact that he went onto the pitch at the swamp in the 70's after a corporate event (obviously security then was not quite what it is now) and took a good long piss all over the goal line and 6 yard box.

To this day he takes great satisfaction every time he sees a Rag keeper diving about in there!

 

[Grand Master Ram Rod]

Brilliant thread this, piss funny!