Oddballs at your work

[Brightwell’s left peg]

Not my work, but a few guys I know pretty well report to a foreign guy who is very weird. Absolute same routine every day. Comes in, grumbles to them for 5 minutes at the start of each day (they genuinely don't know what he's saying to them but they all have to stand there trying to look interested).

They genuinely don't know what he does each day, but just get on with their jobs with little or no direction.

Then every game he makes a substitution at the exact same time, irrespective of the situation.

The guys are clearly pissed off with him.

Weird how people like that stay in jobs for so long?

 

[dan_bo]

Back in college days at McDonalds there was a lad who was about 4'8'' and was a weasley looking character, about 30 years old. He was literally the "jack of all trades"' in the store, slid himself into all the grease traps and behind the places most couldn't get to clean most of the day. He would take any shift you didn't want, providing he wasn't covering someone else's.

Would always dress up like a fucking Inuit no matter the weather and cycle in on a bike that was 5x too big for him. He used to sleep in the staff room on the sofa so he could take a 3 hour break and work someone else's shift and would regularly stay on and end up working like 18 hour shifts. Then he disappeared, just vanished and never turned in again.

Turns out he hit an 80 year old OAP on his bike and rode off into the sunset. Was charged for it and the police turned up to his gaff to find child porn and shit on his laptop apparently. The reason he had vanished and never come back is because he was facing trial and conviction! We all found out about this via the local telegraph years later! He was an oddball it's fair to say.

Catering.

 

[Paul Lake's Left Knee]

We had one Dave 2 shits, I nicknamed him 2 shits, it was because no matter what you had done, he had done it bigger and better, if you'd had 1 shit, he'd had 2, Dave 2 shits, it got to the point where people would make stuff up just to see if he would try and top it, 9 times out of 10 he would. He ended up getting done for stealing computer parts, when they searched his home, they found a load of kiddy porn on his computer and he got done for that as well. Fucking wrong un.

 

[the plasterer]

working on a job in manchester, there was this big bloke from the ivory coast, insisted he was a footballer who recently came up here from swansea, honest

 

[Tricky Dickys Right Foot Shot]

Use to have this right oddball that quit a few years ago.

He was about 5ft, 50 years old and looked like Danny Devito as the penguin in Batman.

He use to rummage through the bins and take whatever he could find in there back home. Once told us a story about when he was in his late teens/early 20's and that his girlfriend cheated on him with his best mate in his car whilst he was driving, then he'd say "I got the last laugh" then proceed to chuckle. We eventually found out that every year on her birthday he would visit a lake where they use to go when they were together so we were adamant that he killed her and dumped the body in that lake.

Also after he quit he visited one of my co-workers at her home and she told me he got on all fours and started meowing at her cat following it around the kitchen!

 

[solley attwell]

Polish lad I work with only recently read an article which said there was traces of gold in a river in Co Wicklow. He's actually going off next week to look for the gold ,, I kid you not.

Another lad goes to Lanzorote 5 times a year to the same hotel on his own, looking for the same room. Every year he decorates the bar with new Xmas decorations that he pays for himself, up to 400 euro every year as the boss keeps the decorations and doesn't give him the money. Whenever the snow comes he could get out of bed at 4 in the morning to take pictures or has even been known to travel up to 100 km just so he can get a glimpse of snow. The guy is in his mid forties and lives with his mammy and daddy and worse of all he is a big rag fan who is so deluded and only believes in good stories about his club

 

[Yates]

We had one Dave 2 shits, I nicknamed him 2 shits, it was because no matter what you had done, he had done it bigger and better, if you'd had 1 shit, he'd had 2, Dave 2 shits, it got to the point where people would make stuff up just to see if he would try and top it, 9 times out of 10 he would. He ended up getting done for stealing computer parts, when they searched his home, they found a load of kiddy porn on his computer and he got done for that as well. Fucking wrong un.

I really want to meet a person who is Genuinely like this, think it'd be hilarious.

Edit: I never read the final paragraph so would like to meet a "2 shits" person not a peadophile

 

[StrangewaysHereWeCome]

When I worked at Royal Mail in town there was a few cranks an half there. One big fat giant of a man who worked in the duties office was known for taking long shit breaks. So long he'd take a big sandwich in with him.

Dirty bastard. Speaking of which, another guy camebto work looking like he'd done his laundry in the sewer. Postie's in the 00's wore bright light blue shirts. His were, and I quote my old pal here, "battleship grey"

 

[Biffo123]

Not my work, but a few guys I know pretty well report to a foreign guy who is very weird. Absolute same routine every day. Comes in, grumbles to them for 5 minutes at the start of each day (they genuinely don't know what he's saying to them but they all have to stand there trying to look interested).

They genuinely don't know what he does each day, but just get on with their jobs with little or no direction.

Then every game he makes a substitution at the exact same time, irrespective of the situation.

The guys are clearly pissed off with him.

Weird how people like that stay in jobs for so long?

Haha , very good

 

[manchester blue]

Use to have this right oddball that quit a few years ago.

He was about 5ft, 50 years old and looked like Danny Devito as the penguin in Batman.

He use to rummage through the bins and take whatever he could find in there back home. Once told us a story about when he was in his late teens/early 20's and that his girlfriend cheated on him with his best mate in his car whilst he was driving, then he'd say "I got the last laugh" then proceed to chuckle. We eventually found out that every year on her birthday he would visit a lake where they use to go when they were together so we were adamant that he killed her and dumped the body in that lake.

Also after he quit he visited one of my co-workers at her home and she told me he got on all fours and started meowing at her car following it around the kitchen!

Why did she have her car in the kitchen? They were as odd as each other!!

I worked with a guy who holidayed in Russia every year and used to bring presents of soap for the young girls in the office. Soap from the hotel bathrooms. One girl found a pubic hair on one rewrapped bar. When I got married he gave me a big digital clock. The big digital clock that went missing from the office a week earlier.