Pies

Didsberry blue said:
supercity36 said:
how much shit do they put in pies. what the fuck is L-cystine hydrochloride???
Click to expand...


I'm sure if Leanne thinks it needs to be in there then there will be a perfectly important reason for its inclusion.
Click to expand...

its probably just used to thicken the filling.
the fillings always looked watery until you added the purity(as we used to call it at hollands').
 
If you look at that ingredients list and compare it to another pie maker, you'll probably find that Hollands contain the most natural ingedients. I mean they actually put real Corriander and stuff into the pies, rather than flavourings.

As I said about the new peppered steak pies (I have one in the microwave now...I know, it should be oven baked for best pastry effect, but I'm desperate for pie), about ten minutes after you finish eating them, you'll find a real peppercorn stuck in your teeth. Lovely.
 
well done didsberry blue fantastic work, i myself am a resident of rossendale and would like to inform you of my knowledge that a good friend of mine has a cousin who is on this pie panel, and nothing would give me more pleasure than shall we say i befriend this fellow and see to it he takes a nice long holiday, therefore creating an opening for a true blue hero and pastry expert like your good self, just give me the word and i can set the wheels in motion, this kind of lapse must never be repeated and on an added note i hear he is a burnley fan.
best wishes and keep up the good work.
 
Didsberry blue said:
I have attempted to mediate this impending crisis through an e-mail to head of marketing at Hollands Leanne Holcroft. I await her response.

"Leanne,

Like any right minded pie fan, I was delighted to hear that Hollands have now become the pie purveyor of choice at my beloved Manchester City. I am originally a Rossendale lad and therefore approx 50% of my diet growing up, came from your Baxenden factory. In fact Leanne, the conundrum in our house was not whether to have a pie every day but which flavour to have.

I have also been a Manchester City season ticket holder for over 25 years and have always felt that putting the two things together would be a marriage made in heaven. It appears that all my dreams have now come true........

except.......

There is one very big cloud on the horizon though and I thought it best to give you early notice as to a very grave situation that will inevitably develop. You see, the pie vacuum created by the absence of Hollands Pies at Manchester City has been filled for many years by a very worthy substitute - the Chicken Balti Pie. The version that has been sold at Manchester City has seen us through several crises, umpteen managers, some very sorry relegations and some very worthy promotions. It has become somewhat of a pie-celebre and a Manchester institution. The Chicken Balti Pie and its natural bed fellow the packet of Rennie has been a staple part of the Matchday experience and for some, like me has become almost a reason for going to watch City in itself. (less so now there is decent football to watch but under Alan Ball, I almost cancelled my season ticket until I thought about the pie related consequences)

Therefore, when I heard that Hollands had been appointed as Official Pie makers to Gods own football team I was at first delighted, naturally. However, my delight Leanne was peppered with concern. What about the Chicken Balti pies Leanne? What would happen to our preferred pie? It began to claw away at me and in truth put me off this years transfer window. It's all well and good signing £100m+ worth of football talent but if it meant doing without a Chicken Balti pie then is it worth it Leanne?

In an effort to ease my rising panic, I logged onto your website to seek some re-assurance and lo and behold, amongst your stadia pies (including the extraordinary football emblazoned meat and potato pie) was a version of the Chicken Balti pie. I attended the pre-season friendly against Celtic with a slight spring in my step, my concern having dissipated and it felt like the clouds had parted and the sun was shining. Well actually the clouds had parted and the sun was shining both physically and metaphorically.

Anyway Leanne, I'll cut to the chase. I raced to the concourse and cut a swathe through the queues to obtain one of your comparison Chicken Balti pies. I bit into my savoury delight only to find something terribly amiss. It appeared that somebody had mistakenly placed a sultana in my pie. I removed the said item from my mouth and took another bite. Another one! Now, everyone likes sultanas Leanne, but not in a savoury pie. Worse, the pie was flaccid and distinctly lacking in spice and heat. For the first time in my life, I failed to finish a Hollands Pie.

Now, happily I can pick one of your other pies for the time being. I've tried the new Peppered steak variety and indeed they are a pie of innovation and beauty. The meat pie, Cheese and Onion Pie and even the humble Meat and Potato pie are solid dependable pies that will never let you down. However, not every City fan is as forgiving as me Leanne and there will inevitably be an outcry and howls of protest from the Chicken Balti faithful. I fear for your reputation and I think you must act with haste to fend this one off.

Fortunately Leanne, I'm not just bringing you problems, I'm bringing you solutions. My strong reccomendation is that you immediately acquire the manufacturer of the previous Balti pie. They did other kinds too but forget about them, just swap their Balti pie for yours. If you act quickly Leanne, nobody will notice and the rumour that your Chicken Balti has sultanas in will be go down as another urban myth. I mean seriously, who would believe that anyway!

I know that times are tight and buying companies in the current climate is no simple task. If you are struggling with the business case then ask the good Sheikh Mansour bin Zayed Al Nahyan to help out. I understand he is partial to the odd pie himself and god forbid he finds a sultana in one. I'm sure he will be only too pleased to help you with your pie acquisition project as he wants every little detail of his football club to be perfect, even pie wise.

I thought I'd better flag this with you Leanne. My advice comes free and if you need any more feedback, you simply must let me know.

Thanks & Best Regards"
Click to expand...

Absolutely superb!!! Great reading, very entertaining whilst still making a very important point.

To add to the pie debate, i personally still haven't recovered from the "meat and potato" being renamed "potato and meat". Its wrong and i'll never forgive them for it.

P.S - FAO Didsbury Dave - my Dad went to watch some of the cricket at Lords and was taken to a Pie stall for lunch. Dad advised they had every type of flavour of pie imaginable, at twice the size. Dad selected the cornish pasty and advised it was the best and biggest he'd ever had. So big he couldnt finish it, and trust me Dad never leaves anything.

Perhaps further research of this pie stall is required to see if they would relocate North and grace us loyal pie eaters with their presence. They are obviously wasted on the southerners.
 
Tueart's scissors said:
Fantastic pie work here boys, tried to eat dinner whilst reading this thread, made it a very messy event ! Just checked on twitter and as yet Holland's have not released a 140 letter statement, although i have "tweeted" them! Will keep all informed.
Click to expand...

They did thank me for my feedback though on Twitter! Very professional these pie companies.
 
Didsberry blue said:
Tueart's scissors said:
Fantastic pie work here boys, tried to eat dinner whilst reading this thread, made it a very messy event ! Just checked on twitter and as yet Holland's have not released a 140 letter statement, although i have "tweeted" them! Will keep all informed.
Click to expand...

They did thank me for my feedback though on Twitter! Very professional these pie companies.
Click to expand...

Yes very professional, I have now been assured also that a new sultana free version is soon to be unveiled.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Unread Posts

Don't have an account? Register now and see fewer ads!

SIGN UP
Back
Top
✖
  AdBlock Detected
Bluemoon relies on advertising to pay our hosting fees. Please support the site by disabling your ad blocking software to help keep the forum sustainable. Thanks.