Seems like it's all happening this week..

Bellamyend said:
this is harsh but there will be nothing more unattractive for her than to see u falling apart.

take control immediately. text her and tell her something has come up. do not communicate with her at all until you are back to your old self. this gives her space too. forget drinking. go pump some iron. take control of your thoughts too, self pity achieves nothing. good luck.
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Totally agree with this. Pleading and begging will not do you any favours.

"Control" is the right word. Don't let he keep dictating when you see each other and all that. Don't even bother to see her, just get on with your life and show her you're a man with some pride.
 
Dubai Blue said:
Bellamyend said:
this is harsh but there will be nothing more unattractive for her than to see u falling apart.

take control immediately. text her and tell her something has come up. do not communicate with her at all until you are back to your old self.
Click to expand...
This is top advice.

You're obviously in a state at the moment and won't do yourself any favours.
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This this and thrice this.

If she says it over, then keep your wits intact, tell her its fucking sad AND WALK AWAY.

The most important thing for you to keep at the moment is your pride. From that moment it is all that will keep you from making a complete tit of yourself in desperate efforts to keep her.

Take ownership of the situation (dont let her control it), you ABSOLUTELY will come out of this intact (wiser and more cynical) but nevertheless intact.

I went through this, i got home from work (worked away a lot) and my four year old son told me that Mum has a new boyfriend. If someone had told me back then what i am telling you now i might not have made such a total twat of myself.

The upside of it for me is my son moved in with me, i went on to meet a tremendous girl, ten times the quality of the old one, and am now making plans to marry again, so although it seems bleak at the moment, there is always opportunity to better yourself in the future.
 
Kris_Musampa said:
Dubai Blue said:
Bellamyend said:
this is harsh but there will be nothing more unattractive for her than to see u falling apart.

take control immediately. text her and tell her something has come up. do not communicate with her at all until you are back to your old self.
Click to expand...
This is top advice.

You're obviously in a state at the moment and won't do yourself any favours.
Click to expand...

This this and thrice this.

If she says it over, then keep your wits intact, tell her its fucking sad AND WALK AWAY.

The most important thing for you to keep at the moment is your pride. From that moment it is all that will keep you from making a complete tit of yourself in desperate efforts to keep her.

Take ownership of the situation (dont let her control it), you ABSOLUTELY will come out of this intact (wiser and more cynical) but nevertheless intact.

I went through this, i got home from work (worked away a lot) and my four year old son told me that Mum has a new boyfriend. If someone had told me back then what i am telling you now i might not have made such a total twat of myself.

The upside of it for me is my son moved in with me, i went on to meet a tremendous girl, ten times the quality of the old one, and am now making plans to marry again, so although it seems bleak at the moment, there is always opportunity to better yourself in the future.
Click to expand...
Listen to this bit too, OP. Fuck I wish I had registered here all those years ago! My list of making a twat of myself instead of maintaining pride includes:
On my knees begging for it to work
On my knees begging for answers why
Barging my way into her house when I found out another man was there, in full view of my scared children
Trying to BREAK into her house at 3 in the morning, again to get to the man in question, starting a fight with her next door neighbour in the process
Shed loads of tears
Fighting with my own DAD because he was telling me to man up
Finding myself at the bottom of my garden in the freezing cold rain, empties all round me and just staring at the house, not knowing what to do. (That was my waking point actually).

Loads more too, but you get the picture, Fitton. I don't mind making a twat of myself on here so you can see it and think, 'that sounds grim, fuck that', because it was a long time ago now and I also wouldn't like to think of a fellow blue go through the same soul-beating shit that those embarrassing episodes created.
 
Pigeonho said:
On my knees begging for answers why
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That's an imprtant point. The "why" in reality is that they have fallen out of love with you. You don't need clarification. Don't get too fixated on the "why" aspect because the truth is you don't want or need to hear the answers.

Desperation is not an attractive quality to any woman ever. Get your head up, keep your dignity and embrace the future.

Good luck mate. You'll heal soon.
 
Well that's it, don't think we'll get back together if I'm honest as much as it kills me to type.

She's just left now, probably for the last time and it's destroyed me watching her leave.

She just said she needs space and to be by herself but after a few weeks or whatever she might want to get back together, but I really can't see it.

End of an era my fellow blue mooners, this double beds gunna feel a lot bigger now :(
 
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