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Selfish slobs on public transport
- Thread starter Deepest Blue
- Start date
On trains, I always just sit on the ground between the carriages. Much more comfortable, more space and I don't have to leave my bag on the rack and constantly worry that someone is going to nick it. The only slight problem is it makes me look like a homeless person who's snuck onto the train, but I can live with that.
There is also no point in doing any of those tricks on the Sheffield buses, as we have militant old people who will sit next to you no matter what you do, even if there isn't a single other person on the bus. They have no fear. The other day, one pulled the headphones out of my ears so she could have a chat with me.
There is also no point in doing any of those tricks on the Sheffield buses, as we have militant old people who will sit next to you no matter what you do, even if there isn't a single other person on the bus. They have no fear. The other day, one pulled the headphones out of my ears so she could have a chat with me.
nijinsky's fetlocks
Well-Known Member
I've not had the pleasure of using buses for years, although I do trains, and in the main find them fine, other than charging £15-25 for a bottle of ice cold Shiraz, that is when they actually trundle into the station and aren't cancelled due to the guard having to take his library books back, or some such bonkers excuse.
I do remember a very drunk bloke on the 192 throwing up all over his chips and gravy at the Apollo, before falling soundly asleep, and waking up at Mersey Square only to start tucking in again and telling all and sundry that it was the nicest coleslaw he had ever eaten.
Oh, and a girl who stood up to get off, told her mate she was 'busting for a piss' and promptly downed her draws and had on on the top deck.
A veritable smorgasbord of human detritus.
Falling asleep was the best option, or growling at folk like a madman, although I tried that once when I was incredibly pissed and some bloke growled back, before starting to masturbate.
I do remember a very drunk bloke on the 192 throwing up all over his chips and gravy at the Apollo, before falling soundly asleep, and waking up at Mersey Square only to start tucking in again and telling all and sundry that it was the nicest coleslaw he had ever eaten.
Oh, and a girl who stood up to get off, told her mate she was 'busting for a piss' and promptly downed her draws and had on on the top deck.
A veritable smorgasbord of human detritus.
Falling asleep was the best option, or growling at folk like a madman, although I tried that once when I was incredibly pissed and some bloke growled back, before starting to masturbate.
TangerineSteve17
Well-Known Member
Moving the goalpoasts slightly, but what is everyone's protocol on this situation:
When you're sat next to somebody on the outer double seat on a full bus, but then a single seat becomes available?
I tend to stay sat where I am because I feel like the person next to me might think "Do I smell or something?" Or maybe they think I smell!
Or maybe they are willing me to move in hope to have a bit of bus ride where their legs might not touch a strangers.
I guess it's just one of those "feel" things.
When you're sat next to somebody on the outer double seat on a full bus, but then a single seat becomes available?
I tend to stay sat where I am because I feel like the person next to me might think "Do I smell or something?" Or maybe they think I smell!
Or maybe they are willing me to move in hope to have a bit of bus ride where their legs might not touch a strangers.
I guess it's just one of those "feel" things.
TangerineSteve17 said:Moving the goalpoasts slightly, but what is everyone's protocol on this situation:
When you're sat next to somebody on the outer double seat on a full bus, but then a single seat becomes available?
I tend to stay sat where I am because I feel like the person next to me might think "Do I smell or something?" Or maybe they think I smell!
Or maybe they are willing me to move in hope to have a bit of bus ride where their legs might not touch a strangers.
I guess it's just one of those "feel" things.
Simple. If you're sat next to a fittie, stay where you are. In fact, move closer.
If you're sat next to a munter, or a bloke, move.
SteWadda
Well-Known Member
TangerineSteve17 said:Moving the goalpoasts slightly, but what is everyone's protocol on this situation:
When you're sat next to somebody on the outer double seat on a full bus, but then a single seat becomes available?
I tend to stay sat where I am because I feel like the person next to me might think "Do I smell or something?" Or maybe they think I smell!
Or maybe they are willing me to move in hope to have a bit of bus ride where their legs might not touch a strangers.
I guess it's just one of those "feel" things.
No point moving because sod laws says next person on will sit next to you
nijinsky's fetlocks
Well-Known Member
Henkeman said:I've always found travelling first class keeps me away from such things...
Nah - you simply get a better class of nutter.
One bloke I sat next to on the way to Cheltenham got out a bag of Charlie and started chopping lines out on the table.
Fortunately he was kind enough to offer me some, so I let his clear faux pas go unchallenged.
nijinsky's fetlocks said:Henkeman said:I've always found travelling first class keeps me away from such things...
Nah - you simply get a better class of nutter.
One bloke I sat next to on the way to Cheltenham got out a bag of Charlie and started chopping lines out on the table.
Fortunately he was kind enough to offer me some, so I let his clear faux pas go unchallenged.
These are the kinds of added value elements that I implore you not to mention in public, for fear of the riff raff realising.
bluwes
Well-Known Member
nijinsky's fetlocks said:I've not had the pleasure of using buses for years, although I do trains, and in the main find them fine, other than charging £15-25 for a bottle of ice cold Shiraz, that is when they actually trundle into the station and aren't cancelled due to the guard having to take his library books back, or some such bonkers excuse.
I do remember a very drunk bloke on the 192 throwing up all over his chips and gravy at the Apollo, before falling soundly asleep, and waking up at Mersey Square only to start tucking in again and telling all and sundry that it was the nicest coleslaw he had ever eaten.
Oh, and a girl who stood up to get off, told her mate she was 'busting for a piss' and promptly downed her draws and had on on the top deck.
A veritable smorgasbord of human detritus.
Falling asleep was the best option, or growling at folk like a madman, although I tried that once when I was incredibly pissed and some bloke growled back, before starting to masturbate.
An Ice Cold Shiraz WTF, I've heard everything now !