United Thread 2014/15

[nijinsky's fetlocks]

Wow - that is the wittiest riposte since Oscar Wilde.
You would have thought that some shameless plastic rag hack could have invented something remotely clever for his retired Dutch porn star wet dream to utter.
I mean, if you go to the trouble of inventing a hypothetical scenario which exists only in your fevered imagination, then surely you should conjure up a denouement more cutting and clever than 'we'll see about that?'
How incredibly anticlimactic.
It's a bit like going to see Bill Hicks, only for him to walk onstage, drop his pants, blow a raspberry, then walk off again.

 

[mac]

Wow - that is the wittiest riposte since Oscar Wilde.
You would have thought that some shameless plastic rag hack could have invented something remotely clever for his retired Dutch porn star wet dream to utter.
I mean, if you go to the trouble of inventing a hypothetical scenario which exists only in your fevered imagination, then surely you should conjure up a denouement more cutting and clever than 'we'll see about that?'
How incredibly anticlimactic.
It's a bit like going to see Bill Hicks, only for him to walk onstage, drop his pants, blow a raspberry, then walk off again.

I bet that the non existent city fan, shit his non existent city pants when he was confronted by the chilling sight and the damning words of the vadge

 

[nijinsky's fetlocks]

Wow - that is the wittiest riposte since Oscar Wilde.
You would have thought that some shameless plastic rag hack could have invented something remotely clever for his retired Dutch porn star wet dream to utter.
I mean, if you go to the trouble of inventing a hypothetical scenario which exists only in your fevered imagination, then surely you should conjure up a denouement more cutting and clever than 'we'll see about that?'
How incredibly anticlimactic.
It's a bit like going to see Bill Hicks, only for him to walk onstage, drop his pants, blow a raspberry, then walk off again.

I bet that the non existent city fan, shit his non existent city pants when he was confronted by the chilling sight and the damning words of the vadge

I am virtually trembling, hypothetically sat here in my cashmere Prada gold embossed boxer shorts, just imagining the literary havok this clog-wearing intellectual colossus will wreak with his unsurpassed linguistic verbiage.
He truly is the righteous natural heir to Mark Twain, George Bernard Shaw and Woody Allen.
Louis van Gaal - visionary, iconoclast, messiah, and ****.

 

[Blue Til Death]

If it didn't happen, make it up, that's the rag media for ya, utterly ridiculous story.. !

 

[Bill]

not in his lifetime by any chance?

 

[nijinsky's fetlocks]

not in his lifetime by any chance?

'...we'll see about that'.
I'm still shitting kittens from every orifice at just how funny that is.
I doubt I shall ever hear anything wittier in my life, and am seriously considering ending it all now, as the world surely has no more wonderment in store.
I'm just glad I was alive to witness the most side-splitting moment in human history.
Louis van Gaal - poet, visionary, guru, ****.

 

[gordondaviesmoustache]

I bet that the non existent city fan, shit his non existent city pants when he was confronted by the chilling sight and the damning words of the vadge

I am virtually trembling, hypothetically sat here in my cashmere Prada gold embossed boxer shorts, just imagining the literary havok this clog-wearing intellectual colossus will wreak with his unsurpassed linguistic verbiage.
He truly is the righteous natural heir to Mark Twain, George Bernard Shaw and Woody Allen.
Louis van Gaal - visionary, iconoclast, messiah, and ****.

We'll see about that.

 

[nijinsky's fetlocks]

I bet that the non existent city fan, shit his non existent city pants when he was confronted by the chilling sight and the damning words of the vadge

I am virtually trembling, hypothetically sat here in my cashmere Prada gold embossed boxer shorts, just imagining the literary havok this clog-wearing intellectual colossus will wreak with his unsurpassed linguistic verbiage.
He truly is the righteous natural heir to Mark Twain, George Bernard Shaw and Woody Allen.
Louis van Gaal - visionary, iconoclast, messiah, and ****.

We'll see about that.

Oh fuck, now you've set me off again.
I am currently rolled up in the foetus position in a state of double incontinence, and Mrs Fetlocks is having to feed me my full English breakfast via a tube.

 

[manchester blue]

not in his lifetime by any chance?

'...we'll see about that'.
I'm still shitting kittens from every orifice at just how funny that is.
I doubt I shall ever hear anything wittier in my life, and am seriously considering ending it all now, as the world surely has no more wonderment in store.
I'm just glad I was alive to witness the most side-splitting moment in human history.
Louis van Gaal - poet, visionary, guru, c**t.

You missed out Football Genius!

 

[nobody can eat fifty eggs]

A Rag to another rag in work this morning:
"Evra's gone"
"Aye 1.5 million"
Me:
"Another rat deserting the ship"
Rag:
"No it's VanGal deciding he's past it"
"Oh right, who've you got to replace him?"
Rag:
"We've got Luke Shaw and that Buttner kid"
Me:
"Buttner's gone ya dickhead he fucked off saying he wanted to win trophies"
Rag:
"Its ok, we've got our youth system at Utd to rely on we dont need to buy big stars like you bitters have to"

Cue raucous, ironic laughter from myself and other blues in work and a sharp exit by the rag, the other rag just sat there shaking his head.

Ha ha, I've not met an intelligent one yet and I'm still searching.