United thread 2017/18

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PW said:
I can think of a few, but in all honesty what right minded adult male human being would be so fucking stupid, sad and needy to go into a shop and have that printed on the back of his shirt. The staff must-have thought "What a cock" but in his mind he thinks he cool, original, funny and their number one fan.

They just seem to be a magnet for ****s, it unbelievable how the swamp can attract so many fucking knob heads, it's like a giant lamp for backward moths. Anyway I'm just of out for a Komendy.
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It makes you wonder I`ve got R.Sole of Salford on my shirt.
 
PW said:
A good few years ago I played in a five aside league every Thursday night. We played the same teams over a course of the season, one of which had a bloke who was about forty and used to wear a full scum strip, including the tracksuit top and bottoms prior to kick off. If memory serves me right I'm pretty sure this full kit wanker had one with VanNistlerooy, one was Beckham and the other was Stam. Depending on his top he adopted the Brian Glover in Kes approach in that he had to take up the position reflected by his shirt choice.

Fucking Idiot.
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'position' in 5-a-side/

Only a rag could ever think such a thing exists.
 
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manimanc said:
Great read mate. Something isn't right that's a ded cert, unless they have just been really really really fortunate and lucky with the draws.
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Not just the CL either. They routinely get strings of soft draws against lower league opposition (mostly at home) in the domestic cups. They got drawn against three non-league sides (and needed replays to beat two of them) in the FA Cup within the space of about 5 years a decade or so ago. As for pulling out some of the worst pub teams in Europe in the Europa Johnstone's Paint Trophy while the better teams were busy knocking each other out last season...
 
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